ATF Valentine’s Tweet Tells Citizens To Report Their Exes If They Buy Or Sell Guns Illegally

The Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco, Firearms and Explosives (ATF) posted a tweet today telling American citizens to call a tip line to report any of their exes who buy or sell guns illegally. Part of the ATF’s tweet read, “Valentine’s … Continue reading ATF Valentine’s Tweet Tells Citizens To Report Their Exes If They Buy Or Sell Guns Illegally

Lonely Pope Encourages Couples to Invite Single People for a Ménage à Trois on Valentine’s Day

Pope Francis gave a Valentine’s Day sermon at St. Peter’s Basilica today in which he asked couples to welcome single people – especially strangers – into their bedroom. The surprising suggestion has many asking if the religious leader is doing … Continue reading Lonely Pope Encourages Couples to Invite Single People for a Ménage à Trois on Valentine’s Day

tesla driver hit by starlink satellite already dead from nueralink implant and car exploding

Tesla Driver Hit By Falling Starlink Satellite Was Already Dead From Faulty Neuralink Implant & Car Exploding, Authorities Say

Authorities have determined that the Starlink satellite that fell directly onto a Tesla in Riverside, California last week was not the actual cause of death for the driver. “After investigation it is clear that the sole passenger was already dead … Continue reading Tesla Driver Hit By Falling Starlink Satellite Was Already Dead From Faulty Neuralink Implant & Car Exploding, Authorities Say

California Might Decriminalize Running Over Protesters Ahead Of Super Bowl

California governor Gavin Newsom announced today that the state is considering passing an emergency law that can give complete immunity to drivers who strike and injure protesters with their cars on public streets. The move comes a day before a … Continue reading California Might Decriminalize Running Over Protesters Ahead Of Super Bowl

BREAKING: Biden Makes Monday After Super Bowl A National Holiday

President Joe Biden has declared ‘Super Bowl Monday’ – the day after the big football game – a new national holiday. The decision was made when Biden read an article about the huge losses that companies already incur on that … Continue reading BREAKING: Biden Makes Monday After Super Bowl A National Holiday

Frontier-Spirit Merger Cancelled After Airlines Try To Charge Each Other Millions In Hidden Fees

A Frontier and Spirit Airline merger fell through just hours after being announced this morning when both companies realized that the other had slipped in hundreds of millions of dollars in hidden ‘merger fees’. “It was a wonderful idea to … Continue reading Frontier-Spirit Merger Cancelled After Airlines Try To Charge Each Other Millions In Hidden Fees

Joe Rogan Uses ‘Free Speech’ Segment To Celebrate Saying The ‘N-Word’ For His 25th Time On Air

Joe Rogan took a very brief break from spreading coronavirus disinformation on his podcast yesterday in order hold a 5-minute “segment on free speech” just so he could say the n-word for his 25th time on air. “I practice a … Continue reading Joe Rogan Uses ‘Free Speech’ Segment To Celebrate Saying The ‘N-Word’ For His 25th Time On Air

Jeff Bezos: Record Number Of ‘Superyachts’ Sold Last Year Shows America’s Poor & Middle Class Still Know Their Fucking Place

Numbers released today by the American Yachting Association reveal that a record amount of ‘superyachts’ were sold last year in the United States. Economists and the super rich alike say this is a sign that the American poor and middle … Continue reading Jeff Bezos: Record Number Of ‘Superyachts’ Sold Last Year Shows America’s Poor & Middle Class Still Know Their Fucking Place

Trump: ‘I Would Never Attack A Single Disgusting, Dishonest, Low-Rated, Enemy Of The People, Fake News Journalist!’

Upon hearing that Joe Biden called Fox News journalist Peter Doocy a “stupid son of a bitch,” former president Donald Trump gave a public statement rebuking Biden. “We’ve got sleepy, creepy Joe being so rude, so unfair, so unpresidential,” Trump … Continue reading Trump: ‘I Would Never Attack A Single Disgusting, Dishonest, Low-Rated, Enemy Of The People, Fake News Journalist!’

NASA Slapped With A Restraining Order After Probing The Sun’s Atmosphere

A restraining order was handed down to NASA on Tuesday after one of their spacecrafts was seen lurking near the Sun before it penetrated the massive ball of fire; touching it right on the atmosphere. Here’s what people are saying: Continue reading NASA Slapped With A Restraining Order After Probing The Sun’s Atmosphere

Jealous?: Anti-Vaxxers Are 11 Times More Likely To Meet God Before You

Scientists across the globe are now starting to admit that there is a perk for those of us who are wisely choosing not to get vaccinated against Covid: We’re 11 times more likely to meet God sooner than all of … Continue reading Jealous?: Anti-Vaxxers Are 11 Times More Likely To Meet God Before You

If Fox News Had Raked The Ground By Their Christmas Tree, It Wouldn’t Have Burned Down

The huge Christmas tree outside of a Fox New’s NYC headquarters was set on fire Wednesday just after midnight by a man who was immediately taken into custody. The flames then engulfed the smaller trees in the decorative display. Here’s … Continue reading If Fox News Had Raked The Ground By Their Christmas Tree, It Wouldn’t Have Burned Down

Judge In Kyle Rittenhouse Trial Gets FBI Escort To & From Nursing Home Every Day

Sources have confirmed that Justice Bruce Schroeder, who is inattentively presiding over the Kyle Rittenhouse homicide trial, is currently residing in Parkside Manor Assisted Living in Kenosha, Wisconsin. Justice Schroeder has been getting FBI escorts to and from the nursing … Continue reading Judge In Kyle Rittenhouse Trial Gets FBI Escort To & From Nursing Home Every Day

Hesitant Parents Sending Least Favorite Child To Get Vaccinated First

Due to widespread mistrust of both science and the CDC, the vast majority of kids age 5 to 11 who have been vaccinated are those designated as the “least favorite child” in their family. In fact, statistics show that more … Continue reading Hesitant Parents Sending Least Favorite Child To Get Vaccinated First