After yet another mass shooting today, 73% of Republican parents in America now support background and mental health checks for gun ownership. “It took awhile, but we’ve reached a tipping point,” registered Republican Donna Davis admitted. “Until it happens to one of your own, or you yourself, it’s just unfathomable for us conservatives to empathize. But after 147 school shootings, we’ve all been impacted.” As of press time, experts are trying to find a way for all Republicans to experience poverty, being a minority, and what it’s like to be surrounded by idiots. Photo by Nick Youngson
Bring your kids in during the school day for some savory seafood as we assault your senses with garlic shrimp scampi, crunchy fiesta shrimp or sesame-ginger grilled shrimp.
“With the amount of mass shootings we’re having, it’s not unreasonable to expect savings of around $4,500 a year.”
“Because you can’t fire a gun in the bedroom, it can be very difficult for our members to achieve an erection without penis pills.”
“If you’re banned you’ll be relocated to a garbage island off the coast of New Jersey.” – Nancy Pelosi
The NRA is utilizing “balloon art guns” and the hashtag #LiterallyDead as part of their marketing.
Our thoughts and prayers go out to everyone who wants to purchase more military-grade weapons.