Jeff Bezos Sues Ex-Wife MacKenzie Scott After Her Huge Donations ‘Make Him Look Bad’

Jeff Bezos has filed a lawsuit against his ex-wife and fellow billionaire MacKenzie Scott claiming that her frequent, substantial donations to charities around the world are making him look greedy. Bezos says he will “spare no expense” in his efforts … Continue reading Jeff Bezos Sues Ex-Wife MacKenzie Scott After Her Huge Donations ‘Make Him Look Bad’

Twitter, Facebook, YouTube, Instagram, TikTok, Snapchat & Pinterest Ban All Content From Trump’s Truth Social On Their Platforms

“We banned him for a reason, so we’re not letting that piece of shit back on here in any way, shape or form.” Continue reading Twitter, Facebook, YouTube, Instagram, TikTok, Snapchat & Pinterest Ban All Content From Trump’s Truth Social On Their Platforms

Little Caesars’ All-New ‘MaxiPizza’ To Be Released For Women’s History Month

Little Caesars announced today that in honor of Women’s History Month the pizza chain will be selling the all-new ‘MaxiPizza’ – which is simply a maxi pad-shaped pizza topped with pepperoni. Little Caesars CEO David Scrivano spoke briefly with reporters … Continue reading Little Caesars’ All-New ‘MaxiPizza’ To Be Released For Women’s History Month

Elon Musk’s Test Monkeys That Didn’t Die From Brain Implant Clearly Plotting Revenge

Recent reports claim that billionaire Elon Musk’s company Neuralink may have killed up to 15 test monkeys by implanting computer chips into their brains. Now, researchers and Musk are saying that the remaining monkeys are clearly plotting revenge. “Every single … Continue reading Elon Musk’s Test Monkeys That Didn’t Die From Brain Implant Clearly Plotting Revenge

Unaware Of Failed Apps Parler, Gettr, Gab, Telegram, Minds & Rumble, Trump Calls Truth Social ‘First Of Its Kind’

Former president Donald Trump told reporters today that his soon-to-be released social media platform – Truth Social – is currently in beta testing and will be available to “real Americans” very soon. In the same statement, Trump also called Truth … Continue reading Unaware Of Failed Apps Parler, Gettr, Gab, Telegram, Minds & Rumble, Trump Calls Truth Social ‘First Of Its Kind’

Meta Sues Trump’s Social Media Company For Ripping Off ‘Poke’ Feature With ‘Grope’ Button

The company formerly known as Facebook has filed a lawsuit against Donald Trump’s new social media company Truth Social. Meta CEO Mark Zuckerberg says that he decided to take action against Trump when he saw the similarities between his ‘poke’ … Continue reading Meta Sues Trump’s Social Media Company For Ripping Off ‘Poke’ Feature With ‘Grope’ Button

McDonald’s Ice Cream Machines Also Broken In The Metaverse

“If you happen to see a working ice cream machine at a McDonald’s just know that you are not in the metaverse and that you are not in reality, Kempczinski warned. “You’re somewhere else and you need to somehow wake up or get the hell out!” Continue reading McDonald’s Ice Cream Machines Also Broken In The Metaverse

Frontier-Spirit Merger Cancelled After Airlines Try To Charge Each Other Millions In Hidden Fees

A Frontier and Spirit Airline merger fell through just hours after being announced this morning when both companies realized that the other had slipped in hundreds of millions of dollars in hidden ‘merger fees’. “It was a wonderful idea to … Continue reading Frontier-Spirit Merger Cancelled After Airlines Try To Charge Each Other Millions In Hidden Fees

Elon Musk: ‘CEO Is A Made-Up Title, Call Me Sir Hair Plugs McBlood Emerald’

Billionaire Elon Musk stunned attendees at The Wall Street Journal’s CEO Council Summit yesterday when he proclaimed that “CEO is a made-up title.” Musk added that he had applied for a formal SEC filing to change his official title to “Sir … Continue reading Elon Musk: ‘CEO Is A Made-Up Title, Call Me Sir Hair Plugs McBlood Emerald’

Little Caesars: ‘We Improved The Crust, But The Rest Of The Pizza Is Still Absolute Trash’

Pizza chain Little Caesars announced today that they have completely overhauled the ingredients that they use to make their pizza crusts, but that they’ve done absolutely nothing to make the rest of the pizza more palatable. “We went ahead and … Continue reading Little Caesars: ‘We Improved The Crust, But The Rest Of The Pizza Is Still Absolute Trash’

Facebook To Change Their Name To ‘Company’ – Making It Hard To Google Bad News About Them

Leaked documents from Facebook headquarters reveal that the corporation will be officially changing its name to “Company” next Thursday. Many people are pointing out that the name change will make it nearly impossible to search for news about the company … Continue reading Facebook To Change Their Name To ‘Company’ – Making It Hard To Google Bad News About Them

conservative coffee company black rifle wont serve black coffee

Confused, Conservative-Run Coffee Chain Too Scared To Serve Black Coffee

Unwilling to learn current social etiquette – and despite the fact that black coffee is widely considered the most “manly” way to take your caffeine – the conservative and veteran-run Black Rifle Coffee Company is still too confused and frightened … Continue reading Confused, Conservative-Run Coffee Chain Too Scared To Serve Black Coffee

Apologetic Boeing Recalls All 787 Aircrafts After Inspection Reveals Planes To Be Lacking Wings, Engines

Quick Facts Boeing has been plagued with recent failures including electrical issues on the 737 Max that caused two deadly crashes killing 346 people. At least 17 of the 787’s were equipped with a single rear engine and no wings … Continue reading Apologetic Boeing Recalls All 787 Aircrafts After Inspection Reveals Planes To Be Lacking Wings, Engines

Hacked: Amazon Crashes After Intern Opens Phishing Email From Jeff.Bezos69@Amazon.net

Would-be shoppers were suddenly unable to complete purchases from Amazon on Sunday night after an intern opened a phishing email from hackers. Sources inside Amazon have confirmed that the intern has been demoted to unpaid warehouse worker. “He opened an … Continue reading Hacked: Amazon Crashes After Intern Opens Phishing Email From Jeff.Bezos69@Amazon.net

Unimpressed: Richard Branson Said He Was ‘Over Space’ Only Seconds Into Weightlessness

Sources are reporting that billionaire Richard Branson quickly became bored with today’s space flight just seconds after passengers began experiencing weightlessness. “The spaceship was at the top of its flight path, 50-plus miles high, suspended in weightlessness while allowing the … Continue reading Unimpressed: Richard Branson Said He Was ‘Over Space’ Only Seconds Into Weightlessness

App Lets Eco-Conscious Users Buy Leftovers Instead Of Just Giving Food To The Homeless

The anti-food waste company Too Good To Go sells food that’s left over, or won’t be sold, through their app. The food, which comes from restaurants, bakeries and grocery stores, is delivered as a surprise grab bag of food that … Continue reading App Lets Eco-Conscious Users Buy Leftovers Instead Of Just Giving Food To The Homeless