Ted Cruz fights bill banning members of Congress from watching porn at work

The bill was expected to pass unanimously, but has turned into an inexplicable, one-man filibuster by Ted Cruz.

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YouReadyGrandma

Pope Francis’ adult book is entitled ‘The Divinci Load.’

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YouReadyGrandma

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“It’s not like we’re asking them to carry our purses up there – although that would be ideal and hopefully it leads to that.”

Somewhat Popular Pornography Genre Takes A Dive in Revenue

YouReadyGrandma

A recent in-depth study by the American Pornography Society (APS) reveals that the massive ongoing sex scandals in the Catholic Church have considerably hurt the “religious pervert on preteen” genre of the multi-billion dollar adult industry. Steve Owens, the head of Research and Development at APS tearfully released the shocking information late Friday night. “It’s just saddening. Saddening and disgusting,” Owens said, “To think that such a great genre of adult entertainment could be ransacked by such an evil group of unabashedly sick men.” Owens continued by stating the major differences between the boy rape of the Catholic Church and the “religious pervert on preteen” sex in the industry. “In porn, all of the sex is consensual, and none of the boys are under the age of eighteen,” he clarified, “However; in the Catholic Church, none of the sex was with boys of consenting age, lives were ruined, and 99% of the priests have never been criminally punished.” The head of APS PR also described the methods used by the Pope and his “minions” to cover up the atrocities. “Essentially, they played hide the rapist priest: here’s a rapist, find the rapist, where’s the raping priest? Round and round diocese to diocese he goes, who get’s raped? Nobody knows! Except the poor kids.” Now, according to APS statistical data (which was compiled in several double-blind studies), most people who used to enjoy this type of pornography now have no interest whatsoever. Stan Billings from Birmingham, AL described his new aversion to his former favorite porn. “I used to think of it as fantasy, pure fiction. I knew it wasn’t really illegal and that nobody was being hurt. That’s why I was okay with it. But now, the images just make me want to vomit and go on a church burning spree.” The APA reports that the genre went from making up 9% of the industry ($200,000,000) down to .03% ($79,000). It is believed that the remaining revenue is mostly coming from church leaders. “Also,” said Owens, “That number would be much higher if so many priests weren’t still getting the ‘real’ thing.” It is reported that this industry will try to rebound by releasing a $50 DVD/Blue Ray entitled “Priests Gone Wild!” Thank you for reading my latest informative news article. Check out more stories below – or like my Facebook Page to get the latest.

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