Finally there’s a way for insomniacs and worriers to get a good night’s sleep.
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Announcement
White House Quietly Removes Treason From Offenses Punishable by Death
“We had a brief window of opportunity here and we didn’t take it,” presidential candidate Cory Booker stated.
Democrats Will Play Cards Against Humanity On Live TV Instead of Debating
“The hardest part for candidates will be trying not to laugh at the very things they claim to find offensive.”
Mike Pence, Other Furries Banned From All Chuck E. Cheese’s
“The children’s entertainment and pizza chain explicitly stated that Vice President Mike Pence will not be allowed inside after his furry tail butt plug incident months back.”
Webster’s Dictionary Adds Photo of Trump to the Definition of ‘Racist’
Today marks the first time that Merriam-Webster has put an official photograph in their famous dictionary.
95% of Americans Don’t Believe That Eric Trump Has Any Bottom Teeth
A recent Gallop Poll of 7,500 Americans showed that 95% of citizens don’t believe Eric Trump has a bottom set of teeth. More News Support the Author Take me to the MEMES!
Harry Styles Cast to Play the Priest Who Gets a Boner in The Little Mermaid
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