“I’m no longer a Christian nationalist. I now want to be called a white nationalist,” Greene told her stunned colleagues. “It’s a no-brainer. I’m white and I’m a nationalist. So it just makes sense to call myself a white nationalist!” Continue reading Marjorie Taylor Greene Says She’s No Longer A Christian Nationalist After Learning The Bible Uses Pronouns
Several states across the nation have started repainting statues of Jesus in public spaces in which the religious figure is depicted with white skin. The move comes after a large group of leftist historians pointed out that Jesus couldn’t have … Continue reading States Are Repainting Statues of White Jesus With Blackface, Citing Racial Inaccuracies
Pope Francis took time out of his weekly address today to tell priests and followers across the globe to “cancel mass, stay home, and read a goddamned Bible already!” “I’m most deeply saddened and ashamed for the priests who have … Continue reading Angry Pope Francis Says ‘Cancel Mass, Read a Goddamned Bible Already!’
Hoping to set a good example for people across the planet, Jesus Christ announced today that He would not be leaving His cavernous tomb this year in order to celebrate Easter; citing the coronavirus as His main cause for concern. … Continue reading Jesus Refuses to Leave His Tomb For First Easter in 2,000 Years
“What better way to show that the United States is a Christian nation than by celebrating Jesus’ crucifixion on America’s birthday!?” – President Donald J. Trump Continue reading Trump Signs Executive Order Moving Christmas to the 4th of July
Authorities have confirmed that Y’all-Qaeda leadership has ties to a Mississippi terror cell referred to as Talabangelicals who are also complete [expletive].
Continue reading Radical Religious Group “Y’all-Qaeda” Bans Abortion in Alabama
“I’ll be watching the donation basket like a hawk as it goes around. You toss a $20 in there and you better believe I’m throwing a few extra sassy swings in your direction during the pot parade.” Continue reading Local Priest Hopes Replacing Incense with Marijuana Goes Over Well
“Starbucks will now be using cups with the following messages and designs instead of the happy holidays ones…” Continue reading Starbucks Apologizes to Christians, Plans to Release a New Line of Religious Cups
“He’s found a loophole here and it’s simply stunning.” – Rudy Giuliani Continue reading Kavanaugh Avoids Sex Scandal by Becoming Ordained Priest Overnight
“We should always be looking up to God before going down to worship,” said Francis. Continue reading Pope Asks all Catholics to Pray Before Oral Intercourse
“Look people, this is ludicrous, Jesus was a white man,” said Kelly. Continue reading Pope Orders All ‘White Jesus’ Figures Removed from Churches
Limbaugh was last seen near his home in Palm Beach, FL. Continue reading Rush Limbaugh has Been Missing for an Entire Year
Trump tweeted and gave approval for the TSA to ban all passengers from flying if they dress like the suspect who is now in detainment. Continue reading United Kicked Woman Off Plane for Refusing to Remove Religious Headscarf, Speak
