Trump Signs Executive Order Moving Christmas to the 4th of July

YouReadyGrandma

“What better way to show that the United States is a Christian nation than by celebrating Jesus’ crucifixion on America’s birthday!?” – President Donald J. Trump

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Radical Religious Group “Y’all-Qaeda” Bans Abortion in Alabama

YouReadyGrandma

Authorities have confirmed that Y’all-Qaeda leadership has ties to a Mississippi terror cell referred to as Talabangelicals who are also complete [expletive].

Starbucks Apologizes to Christians, Plans to Release a New Line of Religious Cups

“Starbucks will now be using cups with the following messages and designs instead of the happy holidays ones…”

Kavanaugh Avoids Sex Scandal by Becoming Ordained Priest Overnight

“He’s found a loophole here and it’s simply stunning.” – Rudy Giuliani

Pope Asks all Catholics to Pray Before Oral Intercourse

“We should always be looking up to God before going down to worship,” said Francis.

Pope Orders All ‘White Jesus’ Figures Removed from Churches

YouReadyGrandma

“Look people, this is ludicrous, Jesus was a white man,” said Kelly.

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