In a bold counter to Elon Musk’s ‘Cash for Votes’ scheme, Kamala Harris has introduced an innovative idea: complete student loan forgiveness for anyone living in a swing state that she wins during the Presidential election. “Those in key swing … Continue reading Kamala Harris Announces Student Loan Forgiveness For All Residents In Swing States She Wins
Trump added that babies from Scandinavian countries would be automatically exempt from testing, claiming, “They have great genes—very clean, very hardworking. But we’ll be keeping a close eye on the others.” Continue reading Trump’s New Gene Testing Initiative Will Preemptively Arrest ‘Ethnic Babies’ With ‘Bad DNA’
Austin, TX — In a move that feels straight out of Black Mirror, Tesla announced it is rolling out an over-the-air update that not only disables Autopilot in areas where it’s not legally approved but also reveals a shocking secret: … Continue reading Tesla Update ENDS Autopilot, Lets Musk Livestream Drivers Via Hidden DashCam: ‘I’ve Been Watching The Whole Time’
When the wealthiest among us keep accumulating and locking away more and more money, two things can happen: 1. If governments don’t print more money, the rest of us — especially the poor and growing populations — face a scarcity … Continue reading Why We Can’t Ignore Wealth Hoarding Anymore
Donald Trump claims to have narrowly survived 13 assassination attempts within 24 hours at the hands of Taylor Swift fans. The chaos began several hours after Trump posted, “I hate Taylor Swift,” on social media, igniting a firestorm online that … Continue reading Taylor Swift Tells Swifties “Stand Back & Stand By” After Trump Survives 13 Assassination Attempts in 24 Hours
🥂🍻🥃🍷 I BET AT LEAST 10%-15% of the 🇺🇸 U.S. is ADDICTED TO ALCOHOL 🍾🍺🍶 THERE’S AT LEAST 7 EMOJIS FOR IT 🤣😿 😈🥬💨 It’s FAR worse than the devil’s lettuce. Nobody talks about it, yet it’s everywhere—on TV, in … Continue reading I BET AT LEAST 10%-15% of the 🇺🇸 U.S. is ADDICTED TO ALCOHOL
🛑 WHAT IF ONLY 25% OF US STOPPED RENTING FOR A JUST COUPLE MONTHS? Here’s a thought: a lot of us are just a bad month or two away from homelessness anyway. Instead of paying outrageous rent, what if 25% … Continue reading What If We Stopped Renting? How 25% of Renters Could Force Change in the Housing Market in Just Months
In a shocking turn of events, J.D. Vance has abruptly ended his bid to be Donald Trump’s vice-presidential running mate upon discovering a crucial piece of … Continue reading JD Vance Drops Out As VP After Learning Trump Isn’t Oversized, Rustic Burnt Sienna Love Seat
Everyone loves to debate whether communism, socialism, or capitalism works. Critics point out the flaws in each system: communism often leads to authoritarianism, socialism struggles with inefficiencies, and capitalism fosters inequality. But here’s a thought: have we ever truly made … Continue reading The Universal Flaw in ALL Economic Systems: We Let a Few Wealthy People Take Control
Ever noticed how America, despite its capitalist roots, isn’t purely capitalistic? Our economy blends elements of capitalism with robust socialist programs like Social Security and Medicare, designed to provide essential safety nets. However, our healthcare system statistically lags behind other … Continue reading Proving America Isn’t Purely Capitalistic: Why Republicans Hate Hearing It and How Their Resistance Leaves Us Lagging Behind Other Democratic Socialist Countries in Healthcare
If you’ve never questioned the biggest beliefs in your life, then you aren’t even living. It’s like playing a video game and refusing to level up. Even Mario knows you should give those mushrooms a try. This goes for religion, … Continue reading Only humble people are truly intelligent
In a nationwide revelation that’s leaving people shocked, it has come to light that sensory deprivation chambers across the United States are harboring unidentifiable substances and even have dead bodies floating in them, as they are rarely, if ever, cleaned. … Continue reading Were You Floating With a Body?: Unclean U.S. Sensory Deprivation Tanks Reveal Missing Persons Mysteries
In an unprecedented and shocking revelation, Toyota Motor Corporation has issued a public apology after it was discovered that the company had been using live humans as crash test dummies since the 1970s. “We deeply regret our actions and the … Continue reading Toyota Apologizes For Using Live Humans As Crash Test Dummies
In a stunning display of insensitivity, Pope Francis has managed to offend one of the most cherished communities in the world by referring to athletes at the 2024 Special Olympics as “retards.” The pontiff, who had previously been known for … Continue reading Pope Francis Calls Special Olympics Athletes ‘R-Word’
In an inexplicably strange move that is raising eyebrows and spirits, McDonald’s has announced the newest addition to their menu: the Grandma McFlurry®, taking comfort food to a whole new level. “This innovative dessert offers customers a unique way to … Continue reading New Grandma McFlurry® at McDonald’s Allows You to Mix Grandma’s Ashes With Your Favorite Flavors
The Sun is crossing its magnetic fields and thinking of anything but the flowing Milky Way as it waits in desperation for the Moon to block the Earth this Monday; allowing it to finally get some privacy. Having not voided … Continue reading NASA Says Sun Will Defecate & Urinate While Moon Eclipses Earth For Privacy
Spirit Airlines, renowned for their inventive fee structures, has introduced an up-charge for the inspection and tightening of aircraft panels. This latest addition to their fees aims to “provide passengers with the ultimate sense of security.” Dubbed the “Panel Assurance … Continue reading Spirit Airlines Adds Fee For Inspecting & Tightening Panels in Your Row
