With the announcement of the 26th Annual Darwin Awards, Donald Trump has found himself on the winner’s list. The leader of the free world tweeted about his accomplishment. Notably, Darwin Award winners are required to be sterile, display an astounding misapplication of judgement, and be the cause of their own demise. Advertisements
The bill was expected to pass unanimously, but has turned into an inexplicable, one-man filibuster by Ted Cruz.
Trump is revealing the meaning of ‘covfefe’ and people couldn’t be more excited.
“This is Trump’s 4th fake marriage, but the first one that makes sense.”
Trump said that the new complex would be “an experiment representing a new approach for overhauling the prison system and has nothing to do with Michael Cohen’s testimony.”
“HOLD THE DATE! We will be having one of the largest gatherings in the history of Washington State,” Trump wrote. “There will be a rainbow of fireworks, the best drag queens – only the best – and the first ever reading of the US Constitution by your favorite President, me!”
“Nick will be up there competing for the same oxygen supply as the President for roughly an hour.”