“Holy hell! C’mon people. Do I need to spell it out for you!?” – Robert Mueller
“The hardest part for candidates will be trying not to laugh at the very things they claim to find offensive.”
Today marks the first time that Merriam-Webster has put an official photograph in their famous dictionary.
“Donald J. Trump is up for Best Performance in a Comedy Series that lasts for one term or less.”
The president cut his speech short and shuffled sideways offstage.
“The swirling rumors say that Melania refused to return to the White House for two weeks.”
“There’s no room for every musky man to lie down on the concrete, so they have to get creative with the cuddling. It just looks like a great experience.” – Mike Pence