Olympic Figure Skater Disowned After Coming Out as Straight

Team refuses to speak to straight, male figure skater. #WinterOlympics

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Mike Pence Banned From Grindr

“Our first guideline for all users is that you cannot use nude photos in your profile, so that was strike one.”

Mike Pence Has Totally Snapped

On Thursday night, Vice President Mike Pence walked up to Donald Trump just outside of the White House Kitchen and “straight up dropped the motherfucker” with a right hook. An hour later at press time Pence was seen entering the The Crew Club – a famous Washington D.C. gay bathhouse. “Obviously nothing matters anymore, so…

Unprecedented Massachusetts Law Bans Homophobes From Bathrooms

(Boston, MA) In what can only be called shocking, Massachusetts legislators have passed a law that bans homophobic people from using bathrooms. The law, which will take effect on Monday, has some people – for lack of a better term – pissed off.

Kim Davis Should be Released From Prison

“On Thursday Pastor Laurie’s utterances were fulfilled by the overreaching hands of the United States Government. It wasn’t Obama taking our guns, it wasn’t Sharia Law taking over OUR country, and it wasn’t another government program to help the poor or sick… it was…”

American Families Blast Target for Removing Gender Labels

Target has announced that it is going to remove boy and girl labels from various aisles and items – including the toy section of its stores. The move, which will make at least all toys (and bedding) non-gender labeled, has caused an uproar in the United States.

Tom Brady Announces Retirement

Brady revealed that he was “very hurt” by the NFL’s decision to ban him for 4 games. Further, the release stated that he “couldn’t stand to see his team slighted like this” – referring to the lost draft picks and $1 million fine.

Harvard Study Reveals that All Homophobic People are Gay

“This lengthy, intricate study was conducted by the folks at the Harvard Center for Brain Science and incorporated proven Penis Responsiveness Technology (PRT) and Brainwave Function Reading (BFR) from leading scientists from the Biomimetic Robotics Lab at MIT.”

Gay, Atheist-Owned Bakery Indifferent About What Cakes They Make

…A move which undoubtedly does not allow Christians to express their personally-held convictions that they are entitled to under an Amendment.

Talk show radio host Rush Limbaugh, upon hearing about the gay, atheist-owned bakery in Bloomington from a caller decided to reveal just how unfair the “Godless, liberals in this country have become.” He issued this challenge to his listeners in the Greater Bloomington area…