Tag: jokes

Announcement, Breaking News, Business, dating, dick pic, Fashion, Life, man, Masculinity, Men, news, penis, Science, sex, Sexuality, Social Media, Society, Truth, U.S. NewsLeave a comment

Dating Apps, DMs Flooded With Hand Pics After Science Confirms Strong Correlation Between Finger Length & Penis Size

youreadygrandma

In a discovery that has completely reshaped online dating culture (and dramatically reduced unsolicited dick pics), scientists have revealed a simple test that may hint at a man’s… proportions. A study found that men with mismatched length index and ring fingers … Continue reading Dating Apps, DMs Flooded With Hand Pics After Science Confirms Strong Correlation Between Finger Length & Penis Size

America, Announcement, application, Business, Entertainment News, Law, Masturbating, Politics, Porn, Porn Industry News, sex, Sexuality, Snooping, Society, Technology, U.S. News, USA, VotingLeave a comment

New Zoom Feature Bypasses Porn ID Law: Screen-Sharing Samaritans Will Help You Get Off

youreadygrandma

(And Maybe Even Become Your New Breast Friend!) Zoom has partnered with Pornhub to release a new feature aimed at helping citizens in Florida, Arkansas, Idaho, Indiana, Kansas, Kentucky, Louisiana, Mississippi, Montana, Nebraska, North Carolina, Oklahoma, Texas, Utah, and Virginia … Continue reading New Zoom Feature Bypasses Porn ID Law: Screen-Sharing Samaritans Will Help You Get Off

Aliens, America, Announcement, Breaking News, Drones, Gun Control, Intelligence, Joe Biden, Latest News, Life, Local News, National Defense, Technology, U.S. News, UFOSLeave a comment

Biden: Mysterious Drones Over New Jersey Can Be Scared Off by ‘Exposing Your Genitals’

youreadygrandma

Gone in a flash 💥🛸 President Joe Biden has offered a bold and unconventional solution to the growing number of mysterious drone sightings over New Jersey: “If one of those big drones gets too close, just flash them. Show them … Continue reading Biden: Mysterious Drones Over New Jersey Can Be Scared Off by ‘Exposing Your Genitals’

America, Announcement, Breaking News, Crime, Economics, Entertainment News, Finance, Game, Health & Wellness, Healthcare, Human Rights, Mental Health, money, Politics, shooting, Socialism, Society, Technology, U.S. News, Video Games, World NewsLeave a comment

Nintendo’s New ‘Dr. Mario vs. Big Pharma’ Lets You Drop Giant Pills Directly on Yacht-Owning Executives

youreadygrandma

REDMOND, WA—Nintendo has announced their boldest game yet: Dr. Mario vs. Big Pharma, a high-octane spinoff where everyone’s favorite mustachioed plumber-turned-physician finally takes aim at the real villains—yacht-owning healthcare executives. In this groundbreaking addition to the franchise, players will guide Mario … Continue reading Nintendo’s New ‘Dr. Mario vs. Big Pharma’ Lets You Drop Giant Pills Directly on Yacht-Owning Executives

America, Announcement, Breaking News, celebrities, Conservative, David Allen Gram, Donald Trump, Family Values, Matt Gaetz, Politics, Republican, School, Senator, sex, Society, Technology, Truth, U.S. News, USA, women's rightsLeave a comment

Trump Revokes Matt Gaetz Attorney General Appointment, Says He Meant Gaetz ‘Needs an Attorney, in General’

youreadygrandma

In a stunning reversal, former President Donald Trump announced today that he was rescinding his appointment of Congressman Matt Gaetz as Attorney General, citing what he called a “small misreading of handwritten notes.” “I didn’t mean the Attorney General,” Trump clarified in … Continue reading Trump Revokes Matt Gaetz Attorney General Appointment, Says He Meant Gaetz ‘Needs an Attorney, in General’

Abortion, America, Announcement, Breaking News, Concentration Camps, Conservative, control, Crime, Donald Trump, election, ELECTION 2024, Equality, Family, Family Values, Health & Wellness, Healthcare, Human Rights, Immigration, Latest News, Life, money, National Defense, news, Politics, Presidential Run, Race, Racism, Racist, Republican, Republicans, Science, Society, Technology, U.S. News, USA, Vote, VotingLeave a comment

Trump’s New Gene Testing Initiative Will Preemptively Arrest ‘Ethnic Babies’ With ‘Bad DNA’

youreadygrandma

Trump added that babies from Scandinavian countries would be automatically exempt from testing, claiming, “They have great genes—very clean, very hardworking. But we’ll be keeping a close eye on the others.” Continue reading Trump’s New Gene Testing Initiative Will Preemptively Arrest ‘Ethnic Babies’ With ‘Bad DNA’

celebrities, Elon Musk, Jeff Bezos, TwitterLeave a comment

Jeff Bezos: ‘If Elon Musk Really Cares So Much About Humanity Why Does He Keep The Secret To Hair Regrowth To Himself?’

youreadygrandma

The ongoing feud between Elon Musk and Jeff Bezos took a strange and personal turn today when Bezos posted a tweet questioning Musk’s philanthropy and clearly implying that the Tesla CEO doesn’t do nearly as much as he could to … Continue reading Jeff Bezos: ‘If Elon Musk Really Cares So Much About Humanity Why Does He Keep The Secret To Hair Regrowth To Himself?’

Crime, Football, Law, NFL, Protest, Sports, U.S. NewsLeave a comment

California Might Decriminalize Running Over Protesters Ahead Of Super Bowl

youreadygrandma

California governor Gavin Newsom announced today that the state is considering passing an emergency law that can give complete immunity to drivers who strike and injure protesters with their cars on public streets. The move comes a day before a … Continue reading California Might Decriminalize Running Over Protesters Ahead Of Super Bowl

celebrities, Entertainment News, TelevisionLeave a comment

Dave Chappelle, Kevin Hart & Louis C.K. All Grammy Nominated For ‘Most Cancelled’ Award

youreadygrandma

Famous comedians Dave Chappelle, Kevin Hart and Louis C.K. have all been Grammy nominated for the Most Cancelled award. The award, which is new this year, was created by the Grammy committee “to recognize how very real and unfair cancel … Continue reading Dave Chappelle, Kevin Hart & Louis C.K. All Grammy Nominated For ‘Most Cancelled’ Award

Entertainment News, LGBTQLeave a comment

Trans People Not Oppressed Enough To Be Left Alone By Dave Chappelle

youreadygrandma

Comedian Dave Chappelle is attempting to legitimize his new Netflix comedy special that focused almost entirely on disparaging transgender individuals. Chappelle gave a brief statement today. “Some minority groups haven’t suffered enough for me,” Chappelle grinned while taking a puff … Continue reading Trans People Not Oppressed Enough To Be Left Alone By Dave Chappelle

Entertainment News, Porn Industry News, sexLeave a comment
Fast food restaurants back to being fully staffed after only fans bans sexual content

Fast Food Restaurants Back To Being Fully-Staffed After Only Fans Bans Sexual Content

youreadygrandma

Fast food restaurants are fully-staffed once again after popular porn site Only Fans announced today that it will no longer be allowing sexual content on their platform. Here’s what people are saying: McDonald’s photo credit Paul Sableman Continue reading Fast Food Restaurants Back To Being Fully-Staffed After Only Fans Bans Sexual Content

Local News, Politics, Science, VaccineLeave a comment
anti science anti mask anti pope anti vaxxer just saying no to everything at this point

Anti-Science Anti-Mask Anti-Pope Anti-Vaxxer Just Saying ‘No’ To Everything At This Point

youreadygrandma

(Knoxville, TN) Local man Brian McMillan, who is an anti-science, anti-mask, anti-pope, anti-vaxxer has found himself so against everything that he’s now stuck saying no to everyone no matter what. McMillan says the new affliction has caused him to regret … Continue reading Anti-Science Anti-Mask Anti-Pope Anti-Vaxxer Just Saying ‘No’ To Everything At This Point

Death, Donald Trump, U.S. News, VaccineLeave a comment

Trump Releases His Own Brand Of Vaccine; Millions Die Of Snake Oil Poisoning

youreadygrandma

Former president Donald Trump announced his “own brand” of vaccine today that was immediately rejected by the scientific community after being identified as literal snake oil. Despite what experts are saying, millions of Republicans have lined up to take the … Continue reading Trump Releases His Own Brand Of Vaccine; Millions Die Of Snake Oil Poisoning

COVID-19, Entertainment News, NFL, VaccineLeave a comment

NFL Pushes For Vaccinations: ‘We’d Prefer Our Players Die From Head Trauma In Retirement’

youreadygrandma

The NFL released guidelines today informing teams that COVID-19 outbreaks among unvaccinated players could lead to forfeited games in the upcoming football season. Some people are saying that the move is basically a mandate for players to get vaccinated. The … Continue reading NFL Pushes For Vaccinations: ‘We’d Prefer Our Players Die From Head Trauma In Retirement’

Jobs, Local News, U.S. News, WorkLeave a comment
welders favorite pastime is telling people to get a job in the trades

Man Who Works In The Trades Favorite Pastime Is Telling Everyone To Get A Job In The Trades

youreadygrandma

MILWAUKEE, WI – Local man and proud welder Joseph Stallsworth says that his favorite pastime is telling anyone who will listen to go out and get a job in the trades. “It doesn’t matter if we are complete strangers or … Continue reading Man Who Works In The Trades Favorite Pastime Is Telling Everyone To Get A Job In The Trades

Food, Politics, Religion, WarLeave a comment
Israeli palestinian conflict ice cream

Ben & Jerry’s To Release New Israeli-Palestinian Conflict Ice Cream That’s Just Chocolate & Vanilla That Refuses To Mix

youreadygrandma

Known for dabbling in politics, ice cream company Ben & Jerry’s is set to release a new ‘Israeli-Palestinian Conflict’ flavor that’s just chocolate and vanilla that is impossible to mix together. “What you’re basically getting here is the choice to … Continue reading Ben & Jerry’s To Release New Israeli-Palestinian Conflict Ice Cream That’s Just Chocolate & Vanilla That Refuses To Mix

Donald Trump, Entertainment News, Melania Trump1 Comment

Melania Trump One Year Closer to Aging Out of Marriage Contract

youreadygrandma

Melania Trump celebrated her 50th birthday today, bringing her one year closer to being released from the marriage contract she signed with husband Donald Trump in 2005. The First Lady, who inked a 20-year agreement with the president, is now … Continue reading Melania Trump One Year Closer to Aging Out of Marriage Contract