WASHINGTON, D.C. — In a move critics are calling “a confession in legislative form,” Donald Trump signed an executive order today lowering the federal age of consent to 10 years old. The decree retroactively changes the law beginning in 1946 … Continue reading Trump Signs Executive Order Retroactively Lowering Age of Consent to 10
The oldest known material on Earth has been identified: a 7-billion-year-old pubic hair scientists believe may belong to God. The hair, which was found trapped in Antarctic ice, is causing many scientists to rethink their views on religion. “We thought … Continue reading Oldest Known Pubic Hair Found in Antarctic Ice Believed to Be God’s
Trump Supporters Burn Bibles After Finally Learning What Jesus Would Do The IRS is facing backlash from Republicans after announcing that churches may only endorse political candidates without being taxed if they can cite valid religious reasons from their holy … Continue reading IRS Accidentally Bans Churches From Endorsing Republicans By Requiring Valid Religious Reasons
In a fiery new rant, former President Donald Trump has claimed that Pope Francis is “possessed by a demon,” following the Vatican leader’s condemnation of several Trump administration policies. The Pope, who is known for advocating for social justice, peace, … Continue reading Trump Says “Pope Francis is Possessed” After Leader of Church Condemns His Policies
California has forced churches to start repainting statues of Jesus in which the religious figure is depicted with white skin. The move comes after a large group of leftist historians pointed out that Jesus couldn’t have possibly been white and … Continue reading California Law Forces Churches to Paint Statues of White Jesus With Blackface Due to Historical & Racial Inaccuracies
When it comes to the most profound questions about existence—whether God exists, what happens after death, or why the universe is the way it is—many of us instinctively seek certainty. But what if certainty is the wrong goal? What if acknowledging the limits of our knowledge is the most intellectually honest stance we can take? That’s exactly what agnosticism offers: a path grounded in openness, inquiry, and realism. Here’s why you should consider it. Continue reading Agnosticism: The Most Honest Approach to Life’s Biggest Questions
According to a leaked memo, Fox News anchors are now only allowed to refer to COVID-19 deaths as “meetings with Jesus.” Many are calling the move a shamefully transparent attempt to influence public perception of the White House’s handling of … Continue reading Fox News Is Now Calling Coronavirus Deaths ‘Meetings With Jesus’
Hoping to set a good example for people across the planet, Jesus Christ announced today that He would not be leaving His cavernous tomb this year in order to celebrate Easter; citing the coronavirus as His main cause for concern. … Continue reading Jesus Refuses to Leave His Tomb For First Easter in 2,000 Years
At his Easter press conference with reporters this morning, a mind blown president Trump shouted at reporters “I just learned that Jesus was brown or black! Did you know that? I just learned it today. What a time to be … Continue reading Excited Trump Shouts ‘I Just Learned Jesus Was Black!’ at Easter Press Conference
“Americans can expect to see Christmas decorations in stores for around 5 to 6 months out of the year.” Continue reading Pope Francis Officially Moves Christmas 2019 to March
The world’s top U.S. whiskey gets an ‘offensive’ marketing overhaul. Continue reading Jack Daniel’s to Use ‘What Would Jesus Do’ Acronym
