Trump violated the presidential records act by tearing up and eating documents

Trump Violated The Presidential Records Act By Tearing Up & Eating Hundreds Of Official Documents

News broke today that former president Donald Trump may have violated the Presidential Records Act hundreds of times due to his incredibly odd habit of tearing up and eating official government documents. “Mr. Trump ate sensitive articles, letters, schedules, briefings, … Continue reading Trump Violated The Presidential Records Act By Tearing Up & Eating Hundreds Of Official Documents

Israeli palestinian conflict ice cream

Ben & Jerry’s To Release New Israeli-Palestinian Conflict Ice Cream That’s Just Chocolate & Vanilla That Refuses To Mix

Known for dabbling in politics, ice cream company Ben & Jerry’s is set to release a new ‘Israeli-Palestinian Conflict’ flavor that’s just chocolate and vanilla that is impossible to mix together. “What you’re basically getting here is the choice to … Continue reading Ben & Jerry’s To Release New Israeli-Palestinian Conflict Ice Cream That’s Just Chocolate & Vanilla That Refuses To Mix

Bill gates says well all eat synthetic beef by 2030 in new book titled the future sucks why we should all give up

Bill Gates Says Everyone Must Eat Fake Meat By 2030 In New Book Titled ‘The Future Sucks: Why We Should Give Up Now’

Billionaire Bill Gates is set to release a depressing new book next week titled ‘The Future Sucks: Why We Should Give Up Now’. Gates, who is typically known for his cautious optimism, says there’s no hope for humanity anymore. “If … Continue reading Bill Gates Says Everyone Must Eat Fake Meat By 2030 In New Book Titled ‘The Future Sucks: Why We Should Give Up Now’

More and more Americans are eating their maxed-out credit cards

Scientists at the World Health Organization who normally study microplastics have shifted their research to larger macroplastics after millions of Americans have admitted to eating their credit cards. “We cannot stress this enough,” head researcher Franz Blankenmann stated, “eating your … Continue reading More and more Americans are eating their maxed-out credit cards

Trump Says He Wonders What Babies Taste Like at Wisconsin Rally

“Wrap the baby beautifully in a flour tortilla and toss it in the oven,” Trump stated while wiping saliva from his chin. “If you do all of that, then maybe I take a little bite. A nibble. I don’t know. I don’t know.” Continue reading Trump Says He Wonders What Babies Taste Like at Wisconsin Rally

Tim Cook Swallows an Entire iPhone XS Max to Prove It’s Environmentally Friendly

“I’m sorry. I didn’t get that,” Siri apologized as a wide-eyed Cook choked on a chunk of the XS Max. Continue reading Tim Cook Swallows an Entire iPhone XS Max to Prove It’s Environmentally Friendly

Trump Eats 17 McDonald’s Apple Pies for Pi Day

“Mr. Trump rationalized eating 17 apple pies before vomiting all over himself and his desk. It makes sense to us, but we don’t expect the mainstream media to get it.” – Sarah Huckabee Sanders Continue reading Trump Eats 17 McDonald’s Apple Pies for Pi Day

Lettuce Recall Helps Millions of Vegans Cut Carbon Footprint by Dying of Starvation

We may never understand what a vegan is, or why fish qualifies as a meat, but we’ll never forget that if global warming is real, at least the vegans died first.” – DonaldTrump Continue reading Lettuce Recall Helps Millions of Vegans Cut Carbon Footprint by Dying of Starvation