ATF Valentine’s Tweet Tells Citizens To Report Their Exes If They Buy Or Sell Guns Illegally

The Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco, Firearms and Explosives (ATF) posted a tweet today telling American citizens to call a tip line to report any of their exes who buy or sell guns illegally. Part of the ATF’s tweet read, “Valentine’s … Continue reading ATF Valentine’s Tweet Tells Citizens To Report Their Exes If They Buy Or Sell Guns Illegally

Heavily-Armed State Of Religious Zealots Encourages Citizens To Turn In Neighbors For Abortions

Heavily-Armed State Of Religious Extremists Commands Citizens To Spy & Turn In Neighbors For Abortions

A heavily-armed state full of religious zealots known as “Texas” has passed a new abortion law that would pay $10,000 to anyone who reports their fellow citizens for having an abortion after 6 weeks of pregnancy. The new law, which … Continue reading Heavily-Armed State Of Religious Extremists Commands Citizens To Spy & Turn In Neighbors For Abortions

5 things you should never do with your penis on an airplane in 2020

Recent studies reveal that nearly 20% of flight attendants saying they’ve received reports of passenger-on-passenger sexual assault on a flight and 68% have been sexually harassed themselves. If you’re keeping up with the times, you should already know that there … Continue reading 5 things you should never do with your penis on an airplane in 2020

Heartbroken: US military is distraught after “wasting 18 good years on that ignorant slut Afghanistan”

The largest military force in the world is in shambles after trying and failing to make an 18 year war with “that ignorant slut Afghanistan” work. Clearly shaken, the US military finally came to grips with reality after longtime friend, … Continue reading Heartbroken: US military is distraught after “wasting 18 good years on that ignorant slut Afghanistan”

Trapped & Furious: Dead Robert Mueller Can’t Cross Over to Spirit Realm Until Barr Releases Full Report

The former FBI Director enrolled in a pottery class Anderson Cooper attends in an attempt to get him to sit in between his legs while whispering key findings in his ear. Continue reading Trapped & Furious: Dead Robert Mueller Can’t Cross Over to Spirit Realm Until Barr Releases Full Report

Mueller Report Says President Trump has a Severe Flatulence Problem

“It’s not uncommon for the President to fart himself awake. Then, when he can’t fall back asleep, Mr. Trump passes the time on Twitter.” Continue reading Mueller Report Says President Trump has a Severe Flatulence Problem

Woman Who Has Barely Traveled Certain She Lives in Best City

Woman Who Has Barely Traveled Certain She Lives in Best City

“Stephenson, who has always lived in Naperville, Illinois, is dead sure that she was born and raised in the best place in the entire world. After being part of a poll by the PEW Research Team in which they interviewed nearly 3,200 people, PEW reported that Sarah – age 32 – was the most unwavering and…” Continue reading Woman Who Has Barely Traveled Certain She Lives in Best City