Armstrong says he didn’t really need to pee, but that he was pranked by NASA…
“In one of the 127 boxes customers will find a serial number,” Cook stated. “That is the number they will enter online; unlocking the ability to purchase the instruction manual for putting the device together.”
“There’s no better way to seem interesting than with a story about the time you were held at gunpoint by the East Harlem crew for wearing the wrong color romper.”
An executive order from the desk of President Trump has put an end to genetically-modified, cyborg baby programs.
“Apple fans will buy it because they are, without a doubt, the biggest consumer whores on the planet,” CEO Tim Cook stated.
“If you can toss a plastic soda ring right around a turtle’s neck or ram a straw up their nose you win $100 in Uber ride credits.”