“I’ve been calling it ‘Global Warming,’ but that’s just a trick folks; a term I use to make snowball jokes. My God, I’m so stupid.” Continue reading Trump Admits ‘The Polar Vortex is Caused by Climate Change’
“Simply put, Apple has accidentally created a shortcut through spacetime.” Continue reading FaceTime Bug Causes Small Wormholes to Appear & Suck Up iPhones, Nearby Objects
“It will sound like an airplane is taking off inside of the user’s vagina,” iBort creator Justin Swartzky stated. Continue reading FDA Approves iPhone Birth Control App
Banana sales have increased by 27% in the United States. Continue reading Dole Recalls 27 Million Bananas for Having Penis DNA
“The first idea that it runs into is the decision that we go with.” – Secretary of Commerce Wilbur Ross Continue reading An iRobot Roomba 690 Robot Vacuum with Wi-Fi Connectivity has Been Running the Country since late 2017
Those who take prescription drugs made by Pfizer will not be able to notice the difference. Continue reading Pfizer Releases Pills that Slowly Deduct Money from Your Bank Account
Tyson offered a confusingly graphic, yet scientific explanation. Continue reading Neil Degrasse Tyson is Donating Sperm in Massive Quantities
“Now it will look like you want to pay attention to your baby.” Continue reading Google & Pampers Partner to Make ‘Pampers Glass’ Diapers
Samsung Soft: Televisions You Can Beat the Living **** Out Of. Continue reading Introducing Samsung Soft: The Smart TV that you can Punch
Female researches have remained cold and distant, uninterested in helping to solve this growing problem. Continue reading Most American Males have Larger Boobs Than Their Wives
I had to simplify it enough so that Trump would maybe understand it and still take the time to read the whole thing.” Continue reading Bill Nye Quits Science Think Tank, Sends Trump Blunt Resignation
“When you get a maniac like Obama. Okay. And he is, he really is. Then you end up with days like today,” Trump stated while pointing toward the only side of the room without any windows. Continue reading Trump Blasts Green Energy, Obama for ‘Unseasonably Dark Day’
Check out more stories below – or like our Facebook page. Continue reading Stoned Sun Listens to Pink Floyd’s ‘Dark Side of the Moon’ and ‘Gets it’ This Time
Leading scientists at the Massachusetts Institute of Technology (MIT) are saying that a large portion of Americans need to hit the reset button on their brains. The problem has gotten so bad that scientists fear many people can’t actually see … Continue reading Study: At Least 50% of Americans Need to Restart Their Brains
Essentially, the screen will intuitively “follow” the assigned user who will have a locator chip implanted in… Continue reading New Samsung Phone Screen Will Cover Entire Surface, and More
“This lengthy, intricate study was conducted by the folks at the Harvard Center for Brain Science and incorporated proven Penis Responsiveness Technology (PRT) and Brainwave Function Reading (BFR) from leading scientists from the Biomimetic Robotics Lab at MIT.” Continue reading Harvard Study Reveals that All Homophobic Men are Gay
For years now you always thought your opinions and worldview were accurate, but now you can say, without a doubt, you are scientifically proven to always be in the right. Continue reading Cambridge University Study Unveils That “Everyone is Correct”
Hey there, it’s me, Focus on the Family. Just uhhhh…. well there’s no easy way to say this. I was minding my business the other day when I decided I would take a peek in a window or three… five, who’s counting right?… Continue reading Focus On The Family Focuses on Yours
