Mitch McConnell Caught Using Taxpayer Money To Remodel His Terrarium

YouReadyGrandma

McConnell is being investigated by the US. Senate Ethics Committee for spending $127,000 on a new heat lamp system and gigantic basking rocks in his office.

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Elizabeth Warren Says She’ll Divorce Her Husband and Marry a Woman to Win the Presidency

YouReadyGrandma

Elizabeth Warren announced today at a campaign rally that she is “ready and willing” to divorce her husband of 39 years and marry her “lifelong best friend Barb.”

Fired-Up Bernie Sanders Sprouts Huge Mustache During Campaign Rally

YouReadyGrandma

“I have never been more turned on in my life.” – Juliet Moore, Bernie Sanders Supporter

Leaked! White House Security Briefing Shows Insanity in Trump Administration

YouReadyGrandma

“It’s convoluted as [expletive]!” Senator Bernie Sanders stated. “The document obsesses over mechanical pencils and references outdated world news without context, but oddly enough everything ‘Trump’ now makes sense.”

Mitch McConnell Admits to Being 1/8th Turtle

“In common public opinion, turtles are just cold-blooded, unthinking and unfeeling creatures,” University of Kentucky Herpetology professor Horace Bartjis stated. “So McConnell really chose the right profession.”

Down-to-Earth Elizabeth Warren Hits Rick and Morty Bong on Instagram Livestream

YouReadyGrandma

The Senator began the livestream by saying “Hold on a sec, I’m going to go grab my bong,” before exiting the shot and flipping on ‘Kaya’ by Bob Marley.

Senator Cory Booker & Elmo Remind Americans: “Despite Incredibly Hot Beard, Ted Cruz is Still a Douche”

YouReadyGrandma

Booker’s 15 minute ventriloquism act included a perfectly performed impersonation of Sesame Street’s best-known character.