Donald Trump announced today that he plans to run for President of Iran in the country’s 2021 election if current leader Hassan Rouhani doesn’t stop his attacks on US bases in Iraq. “I’m going to be the first man to … Continue reading Trump threatens to destroy Iran by becoming their president
In a measured, peaceful, yet offensive response to attacks on US troops in Iraq, president Trump ordered the Air Force to drop over a billion tons of bacon dust over Iran’s capital city of Tehran. “With pork being the only … Continue reading Trump Strikes Back: US drops bacon all over Iran’s capital
“The $85 billion we save a year will go toward green energy, education, infrastructure and ending homelessness in America.” Continue reading Congress Passes Resolution to Completely Ignore Middle East
In a narrow 151-139 vote, Iranian Parliament voted today to allow women to star in pornography. Up until today, women had been barred from appearing in any adult films or printed magazines. “No longer will we have to dress young … Continue reading Historic: Iran votes to allow women in pornography
After months of clashing opinions on Iran, North Korea and Afghanistan, president Trump has asked John Bolton’s mustache to resign. “John’s mustache is big, bushy and beautiful. It tickles my nape,” Trump tweeted. “But it also picked Afghanistan-Iran-North Korea for … Continue reading John Bolton’s mustache forced to resign as National Security Advisor
“It’s convoluted as [expletive]!” Senator Bernie Sanders stated. “The document obsesses over mechanical pencils and references outdated world news without context, but oddly enough everything ‘Trump’ now makes sense.” Continue reading Leaked! White House Security Briefing Shows Insanity in Trump Administration
In an almost immediate response to Obama’s speech, a livid John Boehner was broadcast live on Fox News – interrupting portions of Megyn Kelly’s “The Kelly File” and… Continue reading Iran Talks: Obama to Allow One Nuclear Weapon Per Year
