Joe Biden Calls His Offended Base ‘Whiny Mooncalves’ For Complaining About Sanders Supporters

Presidential candidate Joe Biden stated today at an Alabama rally that all of his easily-offended supporters need to stop saying that all Bernie Sanders supporters are internet trolls and bullies. “Bernie Sanders’ loudest and most controversial supporters represent less than … Continue reading Joe Biden Calls His Offended Base ‘Whiny Mooncalves’ For Complaining About Sanders Supporters

BREAKING: Pete Buttigieg confirms Bernie Sanders said he didn't think a bottom could win the presidency

BREAKING: Pete Buttigieg confirms Bernie Sanders said he didn’t think a bottom could win the presidency

Pete Buttigieg just confirmed multiple reports regarding a 2019 meeting between himself and Bernie Sanders in which they disagreed on whether a bottom could win the 2020 presidential election. “Among the topics that came up was could a bottom win … Continue reading BREAKING: Pete Buttigieg confirms Bernie Sanders said he didn’t think a bottom could win the presidency

Elderly presidential candidates use millions in donations to pay for their personal medical bills

Several presidential candidates have been funneling donations into private health savings accounts in order to pay for their personal healthcare and medical bills as they inch closer and closer to death each day. Donald Trump, age 73, lead in fundraising … Continue reading Elderly presidential candidates use millions in donations to pay for their personal medical bills

Fired-up Bernie Sanders shouts blockage out of his own arteries

After experiencing discomfort in his chest last night, Senator Bernie Sanders went ahead and shouted at a blockage in his arteries until it cleared and his blood pressure returned to normal. “I’m not going to sit here and let 1% … Continue reading Fired-up Bernie Sanders shouts blockage out of his own arteries

Bernie Sanders blew out all 78 of his birthday candles in a single deafening shout

Senator Bernie Sanders celebrated his 78th birthday at his Vermont home today with friends, family, food and a big birthday cake. When the group finished singing Happy Birthday, Sanders – in a single 78-second shout – blew out all of … Continue reading Bernie Sanders blew out all 78 of his birthday candles in a single deafening shout

Steve Cohen Sparks Massive Dumpster Fire on House Floor, Bites Heads Off of Live Chickens

Cohen poured 14 gallons of gasoline, began playing ‘Spark the Fire’ by Gwen Stefani, and lit the contents of the dumpster before biting the heads off several chickens. Continue reading Steve Cohen Sparks Massive Dumpster Fire on House Floor, Bites Heads Off of Live Chickens