Category: Transportation
Tesla Update ENDS Autopilot, Lets Musk Livestream Drivers Via Hidden DashCam: ‘I’ve Been Watching The Whole Time’
Austin, TX — In a move that feels straight out of Black Mirror, Tesla announced it is rolling out an over-the-air update that not only disables Autopilot in areas where it’s not legally approved but also reveals a shocking secret: … Continue reading Tesla Update ENDS Autopilot, Lets Musk Livestream Drivers Via Hidden DashCam: ‘I’ve Been Watching The Whole Time’
Toyota Apologizes For Using Live Humans As Crash Test Dummies
In an unprecedented and shocking revelation, Toyota Motor Corporation has issued a public apology after it was discovered that the company had been using live humans as crash test dummies since the 1970s. “We deeply regret our actions and the … Continue reading Toyota Apologizes For Using Live Humans As Crash Test Dummies
Spirit Airlines Adds Fee For Inspecting & Tightening Panels in Your Row
Spirit Airlines, renowned for their inventive fee structures, has introduced an up-charge for the inspection and tightening of aircraft panels. This latest addition to their fees aims to “provide passengers with the ultimate sense of security.” Dubbed the “Panel Assurance … Continue reading Spirit Airlines Adds Fee For Inspecting & Tightening Panels in Your Row
Unaware Of Air Travel Shutdown, Southwest Flight Cancellations ‘Remained At Same Frequency As Usual’
Samsung Threatens To Sue Elon Musk Over Tesla Phone: ‘We Hold The Patent For Phones That Explode’
Samsung threatened to file a lawsuit against Elon Musk today after the billionaire had an exchange with a video podcaster on Twitter about the possibility of Musk making a new smartphone. Samsung released a brief press release about the issue, … Continue reading Samsung Threatens To Sue Elon Musk Over Tesla Phone: ‘We Hold The Patent For Phones That Explode’
Pain At The Pump: Men With Small Penises Are Most Impacted By High Gas Prices
A study released today by the University of California Berkeley shows that men with small penises have been disproportionately impacted when it comes to soaring gas prices. The findings were directly linked to several other peer reviewed studies that show … Continue reading Pain At The Pump: Men With Small Penises Are Most Impacted By High Gas Prices
NYC To Spend Millions Installing Retractable Spikes On Subway Seats To ‘Poke The Homeless Away At Night’
New York City Mayor Eric Adams told reporters today that the city will be allocating hundreds of millions of dollars to install retractable spikes on subway seats in order to get the homeless to leave the system and go out … Continue reading NYC To Spend Millions Installing Retractable Spikes On Subway Seats To ‘Poke The Homeless Away At Night’
NYC Might Clean Its Streets For the First Time After Finding $20 Bill While Disinfecting Their Subway
After finally removing all of the filth and grime from NYC subways last night with a thorough cleaning, the NYC Metropolitan Transportation Authority (MTA) excitedly announced this morning that they had found a $20 bill in the process. Upon hearing … Continue reading NYC Might Clean Its Streets For the First Time After Finding $20 Bill While Disinfecting Their Subway
Spirit Airlines Began Using Cargo Planes Over the Weekend Without Warning Passengers
Upon boarding planes over the weekend, customers immediately noticed that there were no seatbelts. Continue reading Spirit Airlines Began Using Cargo Planes Over the Weekend Without Warning Passengers
‘Uber Old’ Will Let Elderly Passengers Ride Along, Tell Stories
The option will let baby boomers and the remainder of the silent generation enjoy the company of others. Continue reading ‘Uber Old’ Will Let Elderly Passengers Ride Along, Tell Stories
Uber’s New Submarine Service ‘ScUber’ Will Let Riders Drop Trash Directly on The Great Barrier Reef
“If you can toss a plastic soda ring right around a turtle’s neck or ram a straw up their nose you win $100 in Uber ride credits.” Continue reading Uber’s New Submarine Service ‘ScUber’ Will Let Riders Drop Trash Directly on The Great Barrier Reef