2 in 3 ICE Hires Came From Targeted Ads on Dating Apps for Men With Zero Matches Lynchburg, Virginia — A new study released by Liberty University reveals that over 80% of Immigration & Customs Enforcement (ICE) agents chose the … Continue reading Study Finds 83% of ICE Agents Took the Job Because Raids Are the Only Time They Get to Touch Women
WASHINGTON, D.C. — In a controversial new initiative, President Trump has launched the NARC Act (National Asylum Reward for Caucasians), offering citizenship to undocumented white immigrants who help ICE identify and deport browner illegal immigrants. The initiative was originally named the … Continue reading Trump Launches ‘NARC Act’: Undocumented Whites Offered Citizenship for Turning in Darker Immigrants
Gone in a flash 💥🛸 President Joe Biden has offered a bold and unconventional solution to the growing number of mysterious drone sightings over New Jersey: “If one of those big drones gets too close, just flash them. Show them … Continue reading Biden: Mysterious Drones Over New Jersey Can Be Scared Off by ‘Exposing Your Genitals’
The Pentagon put an end to the ongoing statue removal debate today by ordering every statue in the country to be taken down and replaced with sculptures of our “soon-to-be arriving alien overlords.” The announcement comes just hours after the … Continue reading Pentagon: ‘It’s Time to Erect Statues In Honor Of Our Arriving Alien Overlords’
