democrat, Independent, Politics, RepublicanLeave a comment

Party-Curious Kyrsten Sinema Switches From Democrat To Independent Just To See What People Say Before Totally Coming Out As Republican

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The very brave, former Democrat Krysten Sinema decided to admit to her colleagues today that she is, in fact, an independent. “This may come as a shock to some,” Sinema stated. “But I cannot be more honest when I say … Continue reading Party-Curious Kyrsten Sinema Switches From Democrat To Independent Just To See What People Say Before Totally Coming Out As Republican

Christmas, SocietyLeave a comment

‘My Christmas Tree Eats Popcorn Garland When Nobody’s Looking’ Still Not Concerning Enough To Put Grandma In $9,000 A Month Nursing Home

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After a brief group phone call with closest relatives, the Zelinski family of Oakridge, Illinois decided today that Grandma’s new suspicion that her Christmas tree is slowly eating popcorn garland when nobody’s looking is not concerning enough to justify spending … Continue reading ‘My Christmas Tree Eats Popcorn Garland When Nobody’s Looking’ Still Not Concerning Enough To Put Grandma In $9,000 A Month Nursing Home

Elon Musk, Social Media, Technology, TwitterLeave a comment

New Twitter Update Will Add An Animated Bird That Suggests Slurs & Insults To Spice Up Your Tweets

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Elon Musk announced today that the remaining 17 employees at Twitter have been working day and night to finish a software update that will help users to insult other people on the platform with more creativity. “It’s kind of like … Continue reading New Twitter Update Will Add An Animated Bird That Suggests Slurs & Insults To Spice Up Your Tweets

Politics, Russia, SportsLeave a comment

Brittney Griner Forced To Stand For 10 National Anthems, Say 25 Pledges of Allegiance & Announce That ‘All Lives Matter’ Before Every WNBA Game In Exchange For Freedom

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Republicans refused to cooperate with President Biden’s attempts to free WNBA star Brittney Griner from Russian prison until he agreed that she will be required to stand for 10 national anthems, say 25 pledges of allegiance, and announce that “All … Continue reading Brittney Griner Forced To Stand For 10 National Anthems, Say 25 Pledges of Allegiance & Announce That ‘All Lives Matter’ Before Every WNBA Game In Exchange For Freedom

Business, TravelLeave a comment
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Boeing Issues Massive Recall On All 747 Jumbo Jets After Finding Omitted, 748th Part In Abandoned Warehouse

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Airplane manufacturing giant Boeing stunned travelers and the entire airline industry today when they announced a massive recall on all of their 747 Jumbo Jets. The move comes just weeks after employees came across an abandoned warehouse full of – … Continue reading Boeing Issues Massive Recall On All 747 Jumbo Jets After Finding Omitted, 748th Part In Abandoned Warehouse

Donald Trump, Hunter Biden, Hunter Biden's Laptop, Joe Biden, PoliticsLeave a comment

BREAKING: Hunter Biden’s Laptop Has Classified Docs, Proof He Was Behind Jan 6th, Hidden Tax Records & Evidence Of Election Tampering

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Correction!!! We apologize for inaccurately reporting on this story. The mistakes have since been redacted. Here’s an update: The aforementioned stolen classified documents, proof of orchestrating January 6th, hidden tax returns, and 2020 election tampering are all scandals directly related … Continue reading BREAKING: Hunter Biden’s Laptop Has Classified Docs, Proof He Was Behind Jan 6th, Hidden Tax Records & Evidence Of Election Tampering

Donald Trump, Politics, RepublicansLeave a comment

Wow! Can You Spot The Subtle Differences Between The Official Oath Of Office & What Trump Recited At His Inauguration?

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Do you think you can you spot the differences between the official Oath of Office and what Donald Trump said during his inauguration? For some, it’s not as easy at it may seem. Here’s the Official Oath: “I do solemnly … Continue reading Wow! Can You Spot The Subtle Differences Between The Official Oath Of Office & What Trump Recited At His Inauguration?

Crime, Donald Trump, Election 2020, Politics, U.S. NewsLeave a comment

Massive Fraud Incapable Of Correctly Identifying Massive Fraud

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(Palm Beach, FL) An area man, who perfectly fits the definition of a con artist, has been embarrassing himself by repeatedly and incorrectly telling everyone he’s uncovered proof of massive fraud in the 2020 election. “For his entire career this … Continue reading Massive Fraud Incapable Of Correctly Identifying Massive Fraud

Crime, Hunter Biden, Joe Biden, Politics, TechnologyLeave a comment

Inside Source: Hunter Biden’s Defective Laptop Keeps Playing ‘Someone Like You’ – Most Likely Because It’s A Dell

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An anonymous informant from inside the FBI leaked to reporters today that authorities are still trying to learn what’s on Hunter Biden’s laptop. Apparently, the device is driving agents crazy because it plays the same song when powered on and … Continue reading Inside Source: Hunter Biden’s Defective Laptop Keeps Playing ‘Someone Like You’ – Most Likely Because It’s A Dell

Animals, Fox News, Pets, Republicans, Tucker Carlson, U.S. NewsLeave a comment

Conservatives Boycott Petco & Petsmart After Learning The Stores Are A Safe Haven For Groomers

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A large group of angry conservatives took to social media today to announce a boycott of Petco and PetSmart after learning that both American pet retailers engage in the act of grooming. “Now they’re even going after our pets!” Fox … Continue reading Conservatives Boycott Petco & Petsmart After Learning The Stores Are A Safe Haven For Groomers

celebrities, Elon Musk, Jeff Bezos, TwitterLeave a comment

Jeff Bezos: ‘If Elon Musk Really Cares So Much About Humanity Why Does He Keep The Secret To Hair Regrowth To Himself?’

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The ongoing feud between Elon Musk and Jeff Bezos took a strange and personal turn today when Bezos posted a tweet questioning Musk’s philanthropy and clearly implying that the Tesla CEO doesn’t do nearly as much as he could to … Continue reading Jeff Bezos: ‘If Elon Musk Really Cares So Much About Humanity Why Does He Keep The Secret To Hair Regrowth To Himself?’

Donald Trump, Kim Jong-un, Politics, Vladimir PutinLeave a comment
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Trump Says He Was ‘Unaware’ That Vladimir Putin, Kim Jong-un & Jared Fogle Would Take The Stage With Him

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President Trump held a surprise rally late this morning in which Vladimir Putin, Kim Jong-un, and Jared Fogle all appeared on stage with him. When asked to explain why they were all there, Trump tried to skirt the issue. “Putin? … Continue reading Trump Says He Was ‘Unaware’ That Vladimir Putin, Kim Jong-un & Jared Fogle Would Take The Stage With Him

Fox News, Politics, TechnologyLeave a comment

Study: 79% Of Fox News Viewers Just People Too Challenged By TV Remotes To Learn How To Change The Channel

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A study conducted by Brigham Young University has revealed that the vast majority of Fox News viewers are actually just a captivated audience of people too challenged by TV remotes to learn how to change the channel. “It appears that … Continue reading Study: 79% Of Fox News Viewers Just People Too Challenged By TV Remotes To Learn How To Change The Channel

Gun Control, Republican, U.S. NewsLeave a comment

Man Who Says US Is Greatest Country On Earth Can’t Step Out Front Door Without Being Armed For Combat

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(Milwaukee, WI) Local man James Fielder, who firmly believes that the United States is the best country on the planet, refuses to ever leave his house without bringing at least two guns with him. “I carry these weapons in public … Continue reading Man Who Says US Is Greatest Country On Earth Can’t Step Out Front Door Without Being Armed For Combat

Elon Musk, Technology, Transportation, Twitter, U.S. NewsLeave a comment

Samsung Threatens To Sue Elon Musk Over Tesla Phone: ‘We Hold The Patent For Phones That Explode’

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Samsung threatened to file a lawsuit against Elon Musk today after the billionaire had an exchange with a video podcaster on Twitter about the possibility of Musk making a new smartphone. Samsung released a brief press release about the issue, … Continue reading Samsung Threatens To Sue Elon Musk Over Tesla Phone: ‘We Hold The Patent For Phones That Explode’

LGBTQ, Politics, Tucker CarlsonLeave a comment

‘Tucker’ Carlson’s Name Originates From The Act Of Drag Queens Taping Their Weiners Between Their Legs

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After spending months railing against the LGBTQ community and drag queens by calling them “groomers” and “pedophiles,” Fox News pundit Tucker Carlson admitted today that he is – in fact – named after the act of “tucking,” which is when … Continue reading ‘Tucker’ Carlson’s Name Originates From The Act Of Drag Queens Taping Their Weiners Between Their Legs