Presidential Alerts cannot be turned off on mobile phones. Continue reading Trump: ‘I’m Sending Every Tweet Through the Presidential Alert System From Now On’
“We’re trying to attract more meat-eaters by selling a diverse selection of what we are pretty sure they like to eat,” Continue reading Tofurky Releases Trophy-Hunt Lion Steak, More Options
“The investigation is not meant to be a space expedition. Unfortunately, we don’t have a Space Force yet.” – Kellyanne Conway Continue reading Sexual Predator Could be 2nd Alien on Supreme Court
“I just don’t see the problem here.” – Senator McConnell Continue reading Senate Republicans Hire Hooters to Cater Kavanaugh Hearing
“He’s found a loophole here and it’s simply stunning.” – Rudy Giuliani Continue reading Kavanaugh Avoids Sex Scandal by Becoming Ordained Priest Overnight
“It’s crazy to say it, but you almost wish they weren’t dead.” Continue reading National Association of Funeral Directors Says Photos of Dead are ‘On Fleek’
“If enough of us do it, they can’t catch us all.” Continue reading Tomorrow is National Insurance Fraud Day!