ATF Valentine’s Tweet Tells Citizens To Report Their Exes If They Buy Or Sell Guns Illegally

The Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco, Firearms and Explosives (ATF) posted a tweet today telling American citizens to call a tip line to report any of their exes who buy or sell guns illegally. Part of the ATF’s tweet read, “Valentine’s … Continue reading ATF Valentine’s Tweet Tells Citizens To Report Their Exes If They Buy Or Sell Guns Illegally

tesla driver hit by starlink satellite already dead from nueralink implant and car exploding

Tesla Driver Hit By Falling Starlink Satellite Was Already Dead From Faulty Neuralink Implant & Car Exploding, Authorities Say

Authorities have determined that the Starlink satellite that fell directly onto a Tesla in Riverside, California last week was not the actual cause of death for the driver. “After investigation it is clear that the sole passenger was already dead … Continue reading Tesla Driver Hit By Falling Starlink Satellite Was Already Dead From Faulty Neuralink Implant & Car Exploding, Authorities Say

Mel Gibson Tells Super Bowl Viewers To ‘Cheer For The Bengals’ After Joe Burrow’s Racist Tweets Resurface

Actor and director Mel Gibson ended a Lethal Weapon 5 Q&A session with reporters today by telling them to “cheer for the Bengals” because “that Burrow guy is a racist.” Reporters asked Gibson to clarify his statement. “I’m calling Joe … Continue reading Mel Gibson Tells Super Bowl Viewers To ‘Cheer For The Bengals’ After Joe Burrow’s Racist Tweets Resurface

Trump Carrier Pigeons Twitter Ban

Trump Frantically Ties Hundreds of Handwritten ‘Tweets’ to Pigeons

Hundreds of pigeons bearing handwritten messages from Donald Trump were released from the White House today after Trump was banned from Twitter and nearly every other social media site. The president – who was annoyed by the birds flying around … Continue reading Trump Frantically Ties Hundreds of Handwritten ‘Tweets’ to Pigeons

Brad Parscale Demoted From Campaign Manager to Guy Who Hands Glass of Water to Trump When He Wants to Prove He Knows How to Drink Water

Brad Parscale Demoted From Campaign Manager to Guy Who Hands Bottle of Water to Trump When He Wants to Prove He Knows How to Drink Water

Trump campaign manager Brad Parscale has been demoted to being the guy who hands president Trump a bottle of water when he wants to prove that he knows how to drink water. Parscale has been replaced by Bill Stepien, a … Continue reading Brad Parscale Demoted From Campaign Manager to Guy Who Hands Bottle of Water to Trump When He Wants to Prove He Knows How to Drink Water

‘If You Like Your Skin Color, You Can Keep It’ Trump Reassures Black Supporters

After a morning interview in which former Vice President Joe Biden told black Americans “you ain’t black” if you are voting for Trump, president Trump fired back with two tweets, drawing a sharp contrast between the two candidates. Continue reading ‘If You Like Your Skin Color, You Can Keep It’ Trump Reassures Black Supporters

Lawsuit Filed Against Obama Accuses Former President of Living Rent-Free in Trump’s Head

The White House filed a lawsuit today against Barack Obama which alleges that the former president has been living rent-free in Donald Trump’s head since November of 2008. Evidence admitted with the lawsuit to support the legal claim include a … Continue reading Lawsuit Filed Against Obama Accuses Former President of Living Rent-Free in Trump’s Head

Unprecedented: Coalition of world leaders sign petition supporting Trump’s impeachment

Leaders from Germany, France, Mexico, Canada, Italy, China, Norway, Denmark, the President of the Ukraine, and twelve other countries have released a signed petition publicly supporting Donald Trump’s impeachment. The document – which was drawn up by Canada in order … Continue reading Unprecedented: Coalition of world leaders sign petition supporting Trump’s impeachment

Trump temporarily blocked from using nuclear armed dolphins against hurricanes

House democrats killed a republican-sponsored bill today that would have allowed president Trump to detonate nukes in the eyes of hurricanes utilizing trained dolphins. The 272-158 vote reportedly infuriated the president who immediately went on Twitter to vent his anger. Continue reading Trump temporarily blocked from using nuclear armed dolphins against hurricanes