Facebook announced today that the company will be halting its creation of the new ‘Instagram Kids’ platform after discovering that Florida representative Matt Gaetz – who is under investigation for sex trafficking and sex with a minor – had somehow … Continue reading ‘Instagram Kids’ Cancelled After Matt Gaetz Obtains Beta Testing Profile
There are several simple ways to encourage anti-vaxxers to finally take the shot and help us get out of this pandemic. Slideshow: Main photo credit: Marco Verch Continue reading 9 Easy Ways To Convince Anti-Vaxxers To Get ‘The Jab’
Boosie Badazz has been completely obsessed with fellow rapper Lil Nas X ever since the young star gained fame with his hit songs ‘Old Town Road’ and ‘MONTERO,’ but last night Boosie took it a step too far. Lil Nas … Continue reading Boosie Served Restraining Order After Showing Up To Lil Nas X home With A Boombox
Texas Governor Greg Abbott recently signed a bill into law that prevents abortions after the sixth week of pregnancy – much sooner than most women even know that they are pregnant. That law went into effect today. Under the law, … Continue reading Texans Leave Hundreds Of Unwanted Babies On Governor Abbott’s Front Porch
Pope Francis gave a short speech today in which he expressed a deep concern over the fact that the image of Jesus has not appeared on any snacks or breakfast foods for a very, very long time. The Pope says … Continue reading Pope ‘Deeply Concerned’ As Image Of Jesus Hasn’t Appeared On Waffles, Chips, Fries Or Toast In A Very Long Time
Florida Governor Ron DeSantis’ approval rating hit an all time low today as more and more of his followers continued to die off. In response to the latest numbers, DeSantis plans to host a town hall with his supporters to … Continue reading FL Gov. To Host Huge Event To Figure Out Why His Supporters Keep Dying
Fast food restaurants are fully-staffed once again after popular porn site Only Fans announced today that it will no longer be allowing sexual content on their platform. Here’s what people are saying: McDonald’s photo credit Paul Sableman Continue reading Fast Food Restaurants Back To Being Fully-Staffed After Only Fans Bans Sexual Content
(Knoxville, TN) Local man Brian McMillan, who is an anti-science, anti-mask, anti-pope, anti-vaxxer has found himself so against everything that he’s now stuck saying no to everyone no matter what. McMillan says the new affliction has caused him to regret … Continue reading Anti-Science Anti-Mask Anti-Pope Anti-Vaxxer Just Saying ‘No’ To Everything At This Point
The CDC announced today that anyone who refuses to give their vaccination status should be considered unvaccinated for the health and safety of others. “When people throw a fit when asked the simple question ‘are you vaccinated?’ then you can … Continue reading Everyone Who Throws A Fit For Being Asked Vaccination Status Accurately Marked As Unvaccinated
The NFL announced that it will be taking a more firm stance against taunting this season, including trash talking and making certain gestures toward opposing players. In addition to the tightening of the rule, the league will also continue to … Continue reading NFL’S Ban On Taunting Leaves Fans Unsure How To Teach Kids To Mock & Jeer At Others
Former president Donald Trump announced his “own brand” of vaccine today that was immediately rejected by the scientific community after being identified as literal snake oil. Despite what experts are saying, millions of Republicans have lined up to take the … Continue reading Trump Releases His Own Brand Of Vaccine; Millions Die Of Snake Oil Poisoning
The NFL released guidelines today informing teams that COVID-19 outbreaks among unvaccinated players could lead to forfeited games in the upcoming football season. Some people are saying that the move is basically a mandate for players to get vaccinated. The … Continue reading NFL Pushes For Vaccinations: ‘We’d Prefer Our Players Die From Head Trauma In Retirement’
MILWAUKEE, WI – Local man and proud welder Joseph Stallsworth says that his favorite pastime is telling anyone who will listen to go out and get a job in the trades. “It doesn’t matter if we are complete strangers or … Continue reading Man Who Works In The Trades Favorite Pastime Is Telling Everyone To Get A Job In The Trades
Known for dabbling in politics, ice cream company Ben & Jerry’s is set to release a new ‘Israeli-Palestinian Conflict’ flavor that’s just chocolate and vanilla that is impossible to mix together. “What you’re basically getting here is the choice to … Continue reading Ben & Jerry’s To Release New Israeli-Palestinian Conflict Ice Cream That’s Just Chocolate & Vanilla That Refuses To Mix
Dr. Anthony Fauci is now selling merchandise on the CDC website that says “DeSantis = Death Sentence,” “Don’t DeathSantis My America” and “Don’t Florida My America” after Florida governor Ron DeSantis put “Don’t Fauci My Florida” products on his website. … Continue reading Clapback: Dr. Fauci Now Selling Merch That Says ‘DeSantis = Death Sentence’
Tennessee Republicans made moves today to ensure that the state will no longer be advocating for children to get vaccinated – not just for COVID, but for any diseases – such as HPV, polio and measles. Health experts are saying … Continue reading Tennessee GOP Okays Infanticide Via Polio & Measles By Stopping All Vaccine Outreach For Children
Quick Facts Boeing has been plagued with recent failures including electrical issues on the 737 Max that caused two deadly crashes killing 346 people. At least 17 of the 787’s were equipped with a single rear engine and no wings … Continue reading Apologetic Boeing Recalls All 787 Aircrafts After Inspection Reveals Planes To Be Lacking Wings, Engines
Despite being president for four years, Donald Trump made it clear today that he still doesn’t know how the US government operates. Trump is livid that Brett Kavanaugh – who he nominated to the position of Supreme Court justice – … Continue reading Trump Only Aware Of His Own System Of (Bounced) Checks & (Negative Account) Balances
