“I can tell you how the world ends right now. We fart ourselves to death.” – Stanford Professor Böse Blahung
“Unless Redbox starts squeezing out moist, two-year-old prosciutto with every DVD, I have no idea how they’re going to compete with this.”
“Most of the leathery, ball-related action on the field actually takes place in the players’ jockstraps,” Commissioner Rob Manfred stated.
“Anyone who purchases a drink can get a free tattoo from our baristas this weekend.”
Ginsburg didn’t know she’d broken her ribs until bruising showed through her tattoos.
Garten has been raising her own humans for consumption in a coop next to her garden.
“It’s crazy to say it, but you almost wish they weren’t dead.”