Category: Travel
Passengers Flying Delta Can Now Be Banned For Chronic Flatulence
If you have an upcoming Delta flight you had better get your Gas-X ready. The airline says it will now ban passengers from their planes if they ruin a flight with persistent farting. The move comes just one week after … Continue reading Passengers Flying Delta Can Now Be Banned For Chronic Flatulence
British Airways will exclusively fly people infected with coronavirus to keep passengers safe
British Airways announced today that they’ll be denying all healthy passengers access to flights both to and from China. Instead, the company says it will offer flights exclusively to people infected with the coronavirus. “Our pilots, flight attendants, baggage handlers, … Continue reading British Airways will exclusively fly people infected with coronavirus to keep passengers safe
5 things you should never do with your penis on an airplane in 2020
Recent studies reveal that nearly 20% of flight attendants saying they’ve received reports of passenger-on-passenger sexual assault on a flight and 68% have been sexually harassed themselves. If you’re keeping up with the times, you should already know that there … Continue reading 5 things you should never do with your penis on an airplane in 2020
Delta flights will play same-sex pornography on repeat for the month of December
In an apology for cutting out all LGBT sex scenes from Rocketman – the biographical musical film based on the life of musician Elton John – Delta airlines has announced they’ll be playing nothing but gay sex scenes on flights … Continue reading Delta flights will play same-sex pornography on repeat for the month of December
Director of National Intelligence late to hearing after spilling coffee on AAA TripTik map
Marriott announces guests can no longer steal travel-sized shampoo bottles
In a move that will reduce their plastic waste by 30%, Marriott International announced that their hotels will no longer provide single-use toiletry bottles for guests to steal. Instead, as part of a company-wide green initiative, Marriott says they will … Continue reading Marriott announces guests can no longer steal travel-sized shampoo bottles
Trump asked advisors if he could nuke bedbugs in his Doral Miami resort
President Trump wants to use nukes like they’re Flex Tape. A leaked memo from the White House depicts President Trump asking staffers to look into using “micro nukes” inside Trump National Doral Miami resort to clear out bedbugs back in … Continue reading Trump asked advisors if he could nuke bedbugs in his Doral Miami resort
Spirit Airlines Began Using Cargo Planes Over the Weekend Without Warning Passengers
Upon boarding planes over the weekend, customers immediately noticed that there were no seatbelts. Continue reading Spirit Airlines Began Using Cargo Planes Over the Weekend Without Warning Passengers
Southwest Airline’s ‘Take Your Snake to Work Day’ Backfires Horribly
“We’re asking that all passengers take a look in overhead storage and under their seats to avoid crushing the reptiles and to assist in their capture.” Continue reading Southwest Airline’s ‘Take Your Snake to Work Day’ Backfires Horribly
New DespAir bnb Will Arrange Lodging for Hipsters in the Ghetto
“There’s no better way to seem interesting than with a story about the time you were held at gunpoint by the East Harlem crew for wearing the wrong color romper.” Continue reading New DespAir bnb Will Arrange Lodging for Hipsters in the Ghetto
Elderly Paratroopers Forcibly Removed From Senior Living & Dropped over France for 75th Anniversary of D-Day
Piling Bodies, Trash & Feces Make Mount Everest 9 Feet Taller Every Week
“It’s an odd hellscape where you can hear people scream as their bones crunch under your boots.” Continue reading Piling Bodies, Trash & Feces Make Mount Everest 9 Feet Taller Every Week
Uber Adds Rude ‘Shut Up’ Button to Silence Drivers During Rides
“The abrupt endings of these conversations will lead to awkward silences, but the thrill of a total power trip makes it all worth it.” Continue reading Uber Adds Rude ‘Shut Up’ Button to Silence Drivers During Rides
More Than 6,000 Airplanes are Still Frozen Over US Airspace
“You can expect your loved ones to land safely; with only minor amputations being necessary.” Continue reading More Than 6,000 Airplanes are Still Frozen Over US Airspace