Chase Rice concert-goers were given the rare chance to be literal diehard fans over the weekend as the popular country singer decided to play a crowded show in the midst of the coronavirus pandemic. Seconds into the start of the … Continue reading Chase Rice Fans Reassured That Bleeding From the Ears is Not a Symptom of COVID-19
If you’ve ever considered training for a marathon, but you’re a bit intimidated by the idea of 26.2 miles, here’s some other, faster ways to destroy your body in the exact same ways. 1. Rub your nipples with sandpaper. Nothing … Continue reading Life Hack: 3 ways to ruin your body without having to train for a marathon
After sustaining a broken leg and attempting to call out of work this morning, Ronald McDonald was partially guilted and somewhat threatened into working the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade. Having already squirt blood down most of the 2.5 mile parade … Continue reading Ronald McDonald drags bloody, broken leg down parade route after manager asks “But you’re coming to work, right?”
An unhinged Rudy Giuliani went on NBC’s Meet the Press this morning to announce that he is now being possessed and legally represented by deceased criminal lawyer Johnnie Cochran. According to Giuliani, the famed O.J. Simpson lawyer took over his … Continue reading Rudy Giuliani says he’s hired the ghost of Johnnie Cochran as his defense lawyer
Finally there’s a way for insomniacs and worriers to get a good night’s sleep. Continue reading Having Trouble Sleeping? Bathing in the Blood of Your Enemies Could Help
Weird Foods the Locals Eat: From Alabama to Wisconsin. Would You Try Them? #StrangeFood Continue reading Strange Foods Only Found in These States
“When you get a maniac like Obama. Okay. And he is, he really is. Then you end up with days like today,” Trump stated while pointing toward the only side of the room without any windows. Continue reading Trump Blasts Green Energy, Obama for ‘Unseasonably Dark Day’
“…I’m not happy and I will try to get to the bottom of this and use every legal option possible,” stated Loesch.” Continue reading Altered Media Shows NRA Spokeswoman in Cruel Light
