Starbucks’ red cups come with a secret message printed on the bottom

YouReadyGrandma

According to Starbucks, their new red holiday cup has a secret message written on the very bottom. The writing can be seen on the cup when it’s filled with a hot liquid and tipped upside-down. Only then will customers see the statement “I’m a consumer whore!” appear on the cup. Advertisements

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After 16 years everyone can shut the fuck up about pumpkin spice, scientists say

YouReadyGrandma

Since Starbucks released its Pumpkin Spice latte back in 2003 Americans have recycled the same tired jokes about basic bitch valley girls, UGG boots, North Face vests and sucking down concentrated type-2 diabetes. Scientists now say that after 16 years the pumpkin spice problem can only be killed one way: Everyone needs to shut the fuck up about it. “It’s apparent that the pumpkin spice addicts have no taste or shame,” head researcher Veronica Dayton stated. “However, they do crave attention. So it’s really time that we all just shut the fuck up, ignore their Instagram posts, and wait until they die from attention starvation.”

Starbucks is Offering FREE Tattoos This Weekend

“Anyone who purchases a drink can get a free tattoo from our baristas this weekend.”

Starbucks Apologizes to Christians, Plans to Release a New Line of Religious Cups

“Starbucks will now be using cups with the following messages and designs instead of the happy holidays ones…”

Starbucks is Opening Separate Restrooms for Black Customers

YouReadyGrandma

“Overall, we just want to make everyone feel more welcome and safe at Starbucks.”

Papa John’s Delivery Driver Saves Woman’s Life

Everything began when delivery driver Jessica Sturns noticed that something was awry when she saw the additional comment on the delivery instructions which read:

Man Kicked Out of Barnes & Noble for Reading Out Loud

YouReadyGrandma

“At first I thought she was kidding, because we like to have a good time at the store, but then I walked up to him and he gave me that same ‘what the hell are you staring at’ look that Debra had described.”

Philsmoore told reporters that he wasn’t even that mad until Wellington began to increase his volume.

“It was like he was mocking me. The old bastard wouldn’t quit.”

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