Representatives from the Green Bay Packers organization have admitted to the press that quarterback Aaron Rodgers’ helmet was custom made with a thick tin foil liner at his request. The team says that Rodgers wears the tin foil helmet in … Continue reading Aaron Rodgers’ Helmet Liner Completely Made Of Tin Foil
Due to widespread mistrust of both science and the CDC, the vast majority of kids age 5 to 11 who have been vaccinated are those designated as the “least favorite child” in their family. In fact, statistics show that more … Continue reading Hesitant Parents Sending Least Favorite Child To Get Vaccinated First
Climate and infectious disease experts released a study today saying that in order to completely eradicate COVID-19 from the country that the government could simply burn all 2.27 billion acres of land that makes up the United States of America. Scientists … Continue reading Experts Say Letting U.S. Be Engulfed In Flames Would End COVID Across Country
Former president Donald Trump announced his “own brand” of vaccine today that was immediately rejected by the scientific community after being identified as literal snake oil. Despite what experts are saying, millions of Republicans have lined up to take the … Continue reading Trump Releases His Own Brand Of Vaccine; Millions Die Of Snake Oil Poisoning
Dr. Anthony Fauci is now selling merchandise on the CDC website that says “DeSantis = Death Sentence,” “Don’t DeathSantis My America” and “Don’t Florida My America” after Florida governor Ron DeSantis put “Don’t Fauci My Florida” products on his website. … Continue reading Clapback: Dr. Fauci Now Selling Merch That Says ‘DeSantis = Death Sentence’
Tennessee Republicans made moves today to ensure that the state will no longer be advocating for children to get vaccinated – not just for COVID, but for any diseases – such as HPV, polio and measles. Health experts are saying … Continue reading Tennessee GOP Okays Infanticide Via Polio & Measles By Stopping All Vaccine Outreach For Children
North Carolina Republican Madison Cawthorn told audience members at the Conservative Political Action Conference (CPAC) today that the process of going door-to-door to inform Americans about vaccinations could also be used to take citizens’ guns and bibles. Here’s what people … Continue reading North Carolina Representative Cawthorn Says Biden Could Send People Door-To-Door To Confiscate Bibles & Guns
The Center For Disease Control issued a warning today to the American public letting them know that “the same people who enjoy cosplaying as a ‘good-guy-with-a-gun’ are now also pretending that they are vaccinated.” “They are lying again,” head of … Continue reading CDC Warns That People Who Cosplay As Open Carry Heroes Are Now Also Pretending To Be Vaccinated
Dr. Anthonoy Fauci released a statement today warning Americans that as mask mandates are lifted “it will become harder and harder to spot the assholes in a crowd.” “Watching people scream in public and refuse to wear masks will soon … Continue reading Fauci Warns ‘It’ll Be Harder To Spot The Assholes’ As Mask Mandates Are Lifted
Moderna announced today that the pharmaceutical company was in the final stages of testing a new suppository for the approximately 65 million Americans who are afraid of needles (trypanophobia). Notably, during the study, scientists made the shocking discovery that the … Continue reading Moderna To Offer New Suppository For 20% Of Americans Who Are Afraid Of Needles
A loud minority of Americans are currently refusing to be injected with the COVID vaccine due to unfounded concerns that the shots will change their DNA. “Despite the fact that mRNA vaccines do not impact or interact with your DNA … Continue reading Individuals Fearful Of Vaccine Are Same People Who’d Benefit From DNA Change
