Guy Who Has Never Fucked Anyone That Could Get Pregnant Pushes To Pass Strict Abortion Laws

Continue reading Guy Who Has Never Fucked Anyone That Could Get Pregnant Pushes To Pass Strict Abortion Laws

Republicans Deny Madison Cawthorn Was Invited To Sex & Drug Parties: ‘We’re All Too Old To Move His Body’

House minority leader Kevin McCarthy once again denied claims today from Madison Cawthorn that he was invited to sex and drug parties by fellow members of the Republican party. McCarthy specifically told reporters that even if such parties existed, Cawthorn certainly … Continue reading Republicans Deny Madison Cawthorn Was Invited To Sex & Drug Parties: ‘We’re All Too Old To Move His Body’

Gay Conservative Just Really Turned On By Being Dehumanized

Columbia, SC – Senator Lindsey Graham says the only reason he’s conservative is because he gets “incredibly hot” when he hears fellow right-wingers mock, belittle, and dehumanize homosexuals such as himself. Graham claims this is who he is at his … Continue reading Gay Conservative Just Really Turned On By Being Dehumanized

Senator Lindsey Graham Suggests Americans Play ‘A Rousing Game of Polo’ to Stay Active, Sane

Senator Lindsey Olin Graham, a Southern belle from the great state of South Carolina, suggested to the public today that they all head to the stables, hop on their favorite horse, and play a rousing game of polo. “A horseback … Continue reading Senator Lindsey Graham Suggests Americans Play ‘A Rousing Game of Polo’ to Stay Active, Sane

Lindsey Graham: “I’ll snort cocaine out of Donald Trump’s asshole before I’ll vote to impeach”

South Carolina Senator and closeted homosexual Lindsey Graham told reporters today that he’d “snort a pound of cocaine out of the president’s chocolate starfish before even considering impeachment.” “That’s right,” a wide-eyed Graham continued. “I’ll take a pound of coke … Continue reading Lindsey Graham: “I’ll snort cocaine out of Donald Trump’s asshole before I’ll vote to impeach”