Category: Scott Walker

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Scott Walker Begins Sobering Up to Qualify for Unemployment Assistance

Scott Walker will now have to flush his system of illegal substances in order to qualify for unemployment assistance.

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Scott Walker Believes Only Thing Between Him & Presidency is Dog Allergies

Scott Walker Believes Only Thing Between Him & Presidency is Dog Allergies

“I think I can let my track record speak for itself,” stated Walker. “Yet, I know that there haven’t been any worthwhile presidents who did not have a dog. I mean, Chester A. Arthur was the only president with no pets, and let’s be honest – who the fuck [sic] was Chester A. Arthur?”