Target is moving forward on a decision to introduce a BDSM section in all store locations. The large selection of kinky sex products will be found adjacent to the electronics department.
“Target shoppers will no longer have to make an additional stop at a nearby sex shop while running errands,” CEO Brian Cornell stated. “We now have ball gags, handcuffs, swings, harnesses, cock rings, anal beads, diapers, and my favorite: huge butt plugs – all right here!”
Target says they hope to normalize common adult kinks and make sexuality an open point of conversation within our ‘prude’ society.
“This directly addresses the snowflakes who are afraid to talk about sex. By starting the conversation right next to the Frozen DVDs, Americans have a chance to be more honest and open about hardcore sexual domination,” Cornell said while rubbing his ‘itchy nipples.’
Target representatives said that placing the BDSM section next to electronics was ‘an easy and logical decision’ as they will be stocking remote control vibrators and electro-shock sex toys on the bordering end caps with the large batteries needed to power the new products.
“We have started stocking batteries and power sources that range from 12 volts up to the $899 Yamaha EF2000iS – a 44lb portable generator with a 120 volt maximum and 10.5 hours of continuous performance,” Cornell added.
In response to Target’s move, Sam’s Club has already announced plans to introduce their own BDSM section where customers can buy sex toys in bulk.
“We’re going to do Target one better,” Sam’s Club CEO John Furer said. “Shoppers who come to our many wonderful Sam’s Club locations will be able to walk out with every item necessary to create an elaborate sex dungeon in their own basement.”