Americans Shatter Book-Burning Record on Read Across America Day

“In retrospect, I picked the wrong book to read to them.” Louisiana Governor John Edwards stated. “I chose Seuss’ first published work The Pocket Book of Boners and by the time I finished reading the title all hell had broken loose.”

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Man Kicked Out of Barnes & Noble for Reading Out Loud

“At first I thought she was kidding, because we like to have a good time at the store, but then I walked up to him and he gave me that same ‘what the hell are you staring at’ look that Debra had described.”

Philsmoore told reporters that he wasn’t even that mad until Wellington began to increase his volume.

“It was like he was mocking me. The old bastard wouldn’t quit.”