Authorities are calling Chris Brown’s new album Indigo “32 tracks of incriminating evidence” which relate to 14 new assualt allegations against the artist. Local West Valley police say the public release of the three-and-a-half hour album validates all accusers’ claims.

“Seven of the tracks are just audio recordings of Brown during actual altercations,” West Valley Police Chief Eric Spelling stated. “There’s no music or lyrics, just Mr. Brown descriptively narrating his actions while wailing away on innocent women.”

Critics have noted that the color indigo itself represents a deep, blueish-violet bruising – all on an album that only uses real slaps, punches and kicks for the beat.

As of press time, the record had hit number one on the Billboard 200 chart because humans are trash.

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