Border Patrol Quickly Seizes Top Secret Documents After Trump Throws Them Over Wall

United States Border Patrol informed reporters today that they have recovered a box full of highly-classified documents after former president Trump was spotted attempting to throw the object over the US-Mexico border wall. “It wasn’t one fluid motion when he … Continue reading Border Patrol Quickly Seizes Top Secret Documents After Trump Throws Them Over Wall

Trump Enacts Waiting Period, Background Checks on Purchase of Bumble Bee Tuna

Emphasizing that they’re the perfect size and weight to throw at police officers, Donald Trump signed an executive order today placing a 10-day waiting period on the purchase of Bumble Bee tuna across the country. The new law also requires … Continue reading Trump Enacts Waiting Period, Background Checks on Purchase of Bumble Bee Tuna