Blink-182 announced today that they’ve reunited and will be going on a world tour. The surprising decision to regroup comes after a musically talented alien took over Tom DeLonge’s body before contacting former bandmates Travis Barker and Mark Hoppus.
Barker says that one stipulation the alien inhabiting DeLonge had for touring again was that it gets all of their merchandise for half price.
“The alien inside of Tom seems to be more of a fangirl than anything else,” Barker stated. “It knows all the words and can play all of our songs perfectly. On any instrument. But it’s also very clingy.”
When reached for comment on why it took over DeLonge’s body, the alien stated:
“Tom really stuck his nose into our business; spending years searching for alien life. So I stuck my business up his nose by turning into a puddle of goo and going into his brain.”
A new song titled “Edging” – which is entirely about the sexual act of edging – is set to be released on Friday. Rumor has it that the new Blink-182 album will be called I Like Uranus.
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