There’s a good chance your favorite football player just had a hot enema before taking the field when you watch this Sunday. It’s all because of a growing trend of administering enemas before games to improve player performance.

“Too many times during a game one of the guys has to crap. It hurts the whole team when they get gas cramps or have to go to the locker room,” Patriots head coach Bill Belichick stated. “And then there are the cases where the quarterback literally gets the shit knocked out of them. It happened to Tom a lot, but it’s no longer a problem.”

Photo credit Mike Morbeck