Looking for something to do during the coronavirus pandemic, the town of Sherman Falls, Michigan threw a birthday parade for local resident and 103-year-old WWII veteran Hanz Richter today despite having no idea which side he fought on. Residents say they followed social distancing rules as a stream of cars, floats, and parade-goers went past Richter’s home.
“We could very well be making a huge mistake right now,” Mayor David Douglas told a reporter before the start of the parade. “Nobody can confirm with one hundred percent certainty that Mr. Richter fought for the Allies during the war, but this town desperately needs something to do. We’re all going stir crazy here, so we’ll sort this out in a short while after he dies. Hopefully there isn’t an entire Nazi memorabilia collection in his attic.”
As of press time, Richter was sitting on his porch with his German Shepherd Klaus, holding a Beretta Model 38A, and watching a stream of Americans come dangerously close to his property line.