Study: Millennials are the First Generation to Not View Pornography for the Plot Line

“These kids aren’t fully investing themselves in the vibrant artistic expression and riveting stories.” – Jane Meyers, Head of Stanford’s Sex & Gender Studies


FDA Approves iPhone Birth Control App

“It will sound like an airplane is taking off inside of the user’s vagina,” iBort creator Justin Swartzky stated.

Viagra Ends Trump Sponsorship Deal

“The president had been taking Viagra six times a day – one pill with every meal.” – Rudy Giuliani

Mexico Agrees to Build Wall, Trump Will Permit Underground Tunnels

“I make great deals, okay? This deal is really phenomenal on the surface. It’s a wonderful, superficial deal,” Trump said.

Melania Trump Had Secret Meeting With Divorce Lawyers Regarding Russian Adoptions

Melania’s emails have been released to the public in an act of transparency.

White Americans Will Be Allowed ‘JUST ONE’ 911 Call Per Year

“It really comes down to time and resources.”

An iRobot Roomba 690 Robot Vacuum with Wi-Fi Connectivity has Been Running the Country since late 2017


“The first idea that it runs into is the decision that we go with.” – Secretary of Commerce Wilbur Ross

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