“The investigation is not meant to be a space expedition. Unfortunately, we don’t have a Space Force yet.” – Kellyanne Conway
“I just don’t see the problem here.” – Senator McConnell
“He’s found a loophole here and it’s simply stunning.” – Rudy Giuliani
“If enough of us do it, they can’t catch us all.”
“It appears that he was not remotely aware of the situation and still probably isn’t.”
Users of the popular gay dating and hookup app ‘Grindr’ have reported that Vice President Mike Pence had a countdown to impeachment on his profile that only remained visible for a few minutes. One user managed to snap a screen shot of Pence’s profile before it was changed. Later the two men met at the vice president’s home in Washington D.C. whereupon Pence gave the man a rusty trombone for nearly 4 hours while masterfully performing several patriotic songs with his lips.
“These kids aren’t fully investing themselves in the vibrant artistic expression and riveting stories.” – Jane Meyers, Head of Stanford’s Sex & Gender Studies