Trump Admits ‘The Polar Vortex is Caused by Climate Change’

“I’ve been calling it ‘Global Warming,’ but that’s just a trick folks; a term I use to make snowball jokes. My God, I’m so stupid.”


Lettuce Recall Helps Millions of Vegans Cut Carbon Footprint by Dying of Starvation

We may never understand what a vegan is, or why fish qualifies as a meat, but we’ll never forget that if global warming is real, at least the vegans died first.” – DonaldTrump

Bewildered Hurricane Responders Begin Arduous Task of ‘Moving Everything 10 Feet to the Right’

“Honestly, I think we’re just going to move every piece of debris 10 feet to the right and see if that helps,” Long stated.

Columbus Day: Exxon Discovers, Spills Oil on Native American Land

Dawn has sent 5,500 bottles of soap to help clean thousands of Native Americans who are now covered in oil.

Trump Threatens Italy as Florence Strikes Coast

“It appears that he was not remotely aware of the situation and still probably isn’t.”

Trump Signs Reckless ‘Paperless Earth’ Green Initiative Into Law


A painting by President George W. Bush shows his prediction of the future.

North Korea Accidentally Nukes Itself

The North Korean leader then flipped open a glass-encased red button, pressed it, and was immediately torn apart – along with the rest of his country – by a faulty nuclear missile.

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