Man Tries to Burn Bible & American Flag at Protest, What Happens Next Will Warm Your Heart


An unidentified protester in Portland, Oregon lit several Bibles and an American flag on fire last night, causing outrage across the country. What happened next will warm your heart.

The man wasn’t burned, brutally attacked, arrested or otherwise injured. He later delivered a moving address, stating that his actions represent the beauty of living in a somewhat-free nation that protects your right to free speech.

“I’d like to thank our men and women in uniform for fighting for my right to burn this flag and holy book in order to make a statement about my dissatisfaction with the current state of our country,” the protester declared. “And if you care more about some cloth, paper, and ink burning than you do the systematic killing of living and breathing human beings, then maybe you should reevaluate your life.”

Leave a Comment

Next Post

Racist Food Blogger Buries Mayo Recipe Within 90,000 Word Manifesto on White Power

(Colorado Springs, CO) White supremacist and food blogger Ronald Wilcox says he only meant to post the recipe for his favorite spicy mayonnaise on his blog when he accidentally went off on a highly offensive 90,000 word tangent while describing the importance of pure whiteness in both the mayo and the country. “Welp. I guess I went and did it again! I try to keep my recipes short and to the point, but then this happens.” Wilcox stated as he posted the racist manifesto to “Not too many people would think a condiment recipe could land you on the government watch list, but this spicy mayonnaise just might be the one.” As of press time federal agents were knocking down Wilcox’s front door – having come across last week’s 77-page recipe post that explained how he made a fake birthday cake using yellowcake explosives.
%d bloggers like this: