Epstein digs up and hangs himself again after cemetery night watchmen forget to monitor his burial site

Epstein digs up and hangs himself again after cemetery night watchmen forget to monitor his tomb

The corpse of deceased convicted sex offender Jeffrey Epstein was found hanging in a tree outside of his mausoleum in Loxahatchee, Florida this morning. Authorities investigating the incident say that two night watchmen on duty last night failed to make two of their 30-minute rounds to inspect the grounds and that’s when Epstein killed himself. Again.

“What’s clear is that we have a suicide on our hands here,” Loxachatchee Police Chief Jason Whitfield confirmed. “Mr. Epstein knew that he’d be locked up in that casket indefinitely and he simply couldn’t take it anymore.”

3 thoughts on “Epstein digs up and hangs himself again after cemetery night watchmen forget to monitor his burial site

  1. This is not funny, because he didn’t even do it the first time.

  2. This is not funny, because he didn’t even do it the first time.

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