Disturbing Oscar Mayer ice cream-filled hotdogs leak vanilla out of their tips


American meat company Oscar Meyer has plunged its toes into the dairy dessert world with their release of ice cream-filled hotdogs. Marketed as ‘Vanilla Squirters’ the odd treat hit store shelves this week. What do you think?

“Am I supposed to microwave or freeze this piece of shit?” – Gerald Menard, retired naval officer

“It tastes just like I’m giving a blowjob!” – Janice Lemon, kindergarten teacher

“I fit four wieners in my mouth at once, just like in college.” – Bryan Ruiz, volunteer lifeguard

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President Trump says he'll exchange Puerto Rico for Greenland

After being reminded countless times that Puerto Rico is a part of the United States, president Trump has decided to trade the island for Greenland. “Puerto Rico can’t get their act together,” Trump stated. “So we’re going to swap it out for a nice, white, rich and pristine island. It has ‘green’ in the name, but it’s covered in ice. How about that folks!? Greenland, which is an autonomous country of the Kingdom of Denmark, says Trump can go ahead and fuck himself.
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