Having been caught smelling women’s hair multiple times, Joe Biden’s staff has forced the presidential candidate to get luscious, scented hair plugs implanted so he can smell his own locks instead. Staffers confirm that Biden’s new hair was sourced from his soundproof hobby room where he keeps his personal collection of real hair, mannequins and doll parts.
“I’m running because I have a very particular set of skills,” the 7-foot tall former FBI Director bellowed. “Skills I have acquired over a very long career. Skills that make me a nightmare for people like you, Mr. Trump.”
It is not uncommon for Bear Cubs (scouts as young as 8 or 9 years old) to leave their families for a better life in the forest.
There have been several unconfirmed reports of an orange-ish figure in a black, flowing cloak wandering in Manhattan, New York. The specter appears to be targeting Fox News host Megyn Kelly by leaving a wide variety of arguably sex…