North West’s Pet Hamster Kills Itself After Being Stuck With Kim Kardashian for Two Hours



New York’s Streets Run Red With Blood After State Bans Cat Declawing

“It’s sheer chaos,” New York Governor Andrew Cuomo stated. “Our pussies have gone mad with power.”

Taco Bell Releases Cheese-Free Colon Cleanse Menu

“Without the cheese it just flows right through you.” – CEO Brian Niccols

23andMe Discovers Gary Busey & Boris Johnson Are Trump’s Brothers

“Genetically-speaking the lineage has certain characteristics that really stand out; such as having categorically unpleasant hair and personalities.” – 23andMe CEO Anne Wojcicki

Titanic Sequel: ‘Titanic Rising’ to Be Released this Summer

Hopes are high for this sequel as the original 1997 hit raked in over $1.5 billion worldwide.

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