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Kim Kardashian Sues Jack in the Box Over Explosive Diarrhea

Kim Kardashian tweeted that she had a serious complaint to file with Jack in the Box, but declined to say what the problem was about.

“After speaking with Kim, we now know she came down with bouts of explosive diarrhea from eating our Stacked Grilled Cheeseburger Munchie Meal from a Northern Hollywood location,” a Jack in the Box press release read.

“Because of the food poisoning, Kim has also experienced dramatic silicone loss in the ass, lip and breast regions; leaving her looking like an old Middle Eastern man with two little people living in the backside of her pants.”

The release from Jack in the Box concluded by saying that the two parties had agreed to “pump Kim full of liquids and gels and consider the matter settled.”

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