Washington Redskins Change Mascot to The Negroes

“In lieu of officially being called “The Redskins,” the team has announced – in a short press release – that they will now go by “The Washington…”

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In a reevaluation of Pro-Football, Inc. v. Harjo, The Washington Redskins football team was just forced by the United States District Court of Columbia to change their team name. The lingering issue, which has been debated for years between historically educated hippies and people who value tradition over everything else – has finally come to a close.

In lieu of officially being called “The Redskins,” the team has announced – in a short press release – that they will now go by “The Washington Negroes.” Part of the statement read:

“It’s like Spanish for black, which is cool because the largest demographic in Washington D.C. is black people – well, and because black is a formidable, ominous color.”

The release continued on with more details, “We’re thinking of having Bill Cosby as our mascot because he’s deceptive and dangerous, just like our defensive attack. Yet, it’s calculated and debilitating, much like our offensive game plan and whatever Bill put in those drinks.”

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