Focus On The Family Focuses on Yours

Focus On The Family Focuses on Yours

Focus On The Family Focuses on Yours
Hey there, it’s me, Focus on the Family.  Just uhhhh…. well there’s no easy way to say this.  I was minding my business the other day when I decided I would take a peek in a window or three… five, who’s counting right?…

Anywhooo, I noticed from several angles that you are not using compact fluorescent light bulbs.  That would really save you a lot of energy and you should stop masturbating, it’s a sin.

Also, when you left your garage open last Sunday because you were in a hurry to not GO TO CHURCH I managed to let myself in.  (I hope you don’t mind) So after I picked your lock I decided to head right up the stairs to your daughter’s room.

After perusing a bit through her backpack I found a science book.  You should really throw this out.  Well, actually, I thought to myself “I should really throw this out!”  So I did.  You do not need to thank me.

On my way out to the road I hid in the bushes when I heard you to coming home from NOT CHURCH.

I poked holes in all of your condoms.

Sincerely,

Focus on the Family

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